It had been a three days since she had seen her mentor... After their encounter with the ancient Allie's world had been a living hell. Her mind was in shambles, her body and spirit were broken. She had not eaten in three days, the longest in recent times she had ever gone without blood. And it showed. She looked like a corpes. A living skeleton wrapped in clothing. Her skin was grey as as, with a withered look to it. er eyes lifeless, pale. Her hair, hidden only slightly under the hood of her sweetshirt, was limp, dull, not it's usual light and golden color. And she was trembling nonstop with hunger and weakness.

She had not fed since the encounter, terrified to let the monster out as if it would never leave her again. She would last, maybe another two or three nights while she slowly starved to death. And she had held out this long... She could go longer, so long as she did not run into a human... She had done well so far, pretending them just a figment of her imagination.

Besides, they were not what she was seeking now... The night before and tonight, and untill she found him would be Ambros. She needed his council, his guidance... But if he could not help her... She had come to say goodbye.

He had tried to help her control herself. And he had brought her further than anyone had ever done before. She had to thank him... To tell him that it was not his fault that she had failed. It was not his fault that she was weak.

But where would he be? She could not remember where he lived, so she could not seek him there... "Ambros..." She whispered both out loud and in her mind as loud as she could. "Where are you... Please hear me..."

It was a pretty gloomy night, and Ambros hadn't fed, and felt a little thirsty. Maybe he'd go and have a little bit to drink, but he found himself wandering the streets of Demaitre. He could hear Allie's voice ringing through his mind. He failed her, he should've been able to give her hope, but instead he abandoned her. He didn't deserve forgiveness for abandoning her. He even felt Allie's hunger through the mental voice. Ambros had to face her sooner or later.

Ambros walked towards Allie folowing the strength of her mental voice. Maybe he'd be able to help her, maybe he couldn't. He spotted Allie before he sensed her, she looked horrible. Once he was within arms length of Allie he wrapped his leather jacket around her body. He knew it wouldn't do any good since she was a vampire, but it would help hide her from sight. "Hello Allie." He said as he gently rested his arm on her shoulders. "How long has it been since you've fed?"

She was so weak she couldn't even sence his approach. But she felt his hands and gave a small gasp. Turning to see her mentor, one she cared for greatly even loved, she fled to his arms, pressing herself against him as if for strength.

"Ambros..." She whispered, but that was as loud as her voice would go. "Oh Ambros I'm so sorry..." She whispered softly. She was sorry for everything she might have done to hurt him, dissapoint him.

She was quiet at his question for a while, not sure if she should answer it. "Since that night..." She responded... "This is the end Ambros... I'm sorry. I can't go on anymore..." Yes. She would return home tonight... And she would not leave it tomorrow... And come the following night, she would finaly have the peace she was looking for. "I'm so alone... And I'm sick of this monster..."

If she were able to cry, she would have. But her body was saving her blood for the most vital of parts. Which is why her senses had all dimmed, now only just greater than a humans.

She nuzzled against him lovingly. Thank you for everything you've tried to do for me Ambros... But please.. Understand... nothing is your fault... I'm just so weak. " She was a social creature. Alone, she was nothing. She needed another to help her stand.

Ambros laughed as he listened to Allie say sorry. "What're you sorry for? There's nothing to apologize for. I should be apologizing to you, I failed you as a teacher." He squeezed her affectionately. He looked down at Allie's face, and smiled. "You have to live on Allie. If you give up now then you'll die not knowing what tomorrow will bring. You love that human, Josh right?" He started walking a little bit with her. "What happens to him after you die? I'm sure he loves you just as much as you love him, if not more."

Ambros shook his head as they walked. "You've got legs don't you? Even though I failed as a teacher I've got one last lesson for you." He didn't let go of Allie, he felt that if he did he'd lose her forever, the girl was like a daughter to him...the daughter he never had. "You need to learn to stand by yourself, only then you'll realize that you've got more strength than you think." He smiled at Allie even though he felt as if his heart was sinking. It might be dead, but he still had his emotions. "Who cares about that monster? The only one who can take care of it is you. I can only prepare you." Ambros kissed the top of Allie's head, and held her close to him. He failed her three nights ago, but he wasn't going to fail her again.

She shook her head as he mentioned Josh. "It can never be Ambros..." She whispered. "It was just a dream... A silly dream that will never come true." He was terrified of her, they could never truly be. 'And all each day ever brings me is death Ambros. Why would I ever want that?"

Allie refused to believe Ambros had failed her. "No...you did not fail me my love. It is not your fault that I am weak, that I can't fight the beast within me. I have tried and failed for too long..." Her voice was still soft as she caressed his chest, she wanted to touch him, to kiss his lips gently, but she dare not touch her skin to his. "I cannot fail again." A convulsion ran through her body, wincing at the pain. That was the third time that had happened. Perhaps it was just the beginning of the end.

Lifting her dull, lifeless eyes to his, for the first time in her life she felt truly and thouroghly ugly. She could only fatham what she looked like. A horiffic monser, like she invisioned the creature in her. There was something else she had to tell him before she left as well... She had known it since he saved her than night outside of the bar... But she had kept it hidden, thinking he would reject her as the monster she was...

"I love you Ambros..." She whispered.

Ambros looked deep into Allie's eyes. He could feel himself drifting inside of those eyes. He realized that he didn't think of Allie as a daughter, but as an equal. Even in her current state he thought she was beautiful. He hadn't felt that way since Cecelia died to save him. "You can change your future Allie, death doesn't have to be part of it." He closed his eyes, and leaned in close to Allie. "I love you as well." His hand gently cupped the back of Allie's head as he kissed deeply. All he could think about was Allie, he wanted this night to last forever. Memories of the first time they met flashed through his mind. Memories of how she asked for his help, how he tried to help Allie with her demon. Ambros broke the kiss, and gazed at Allie. "Allow me to help you Allie. Allow me to carry your burden." Ambros hugged Allie as he felt tears start to form. It was well over 400 years since he last cried, and it felt odd to him. Ambros had a burden that he carried for far too long by himself, maybe it was time to move on, and take his own advice.

No, why was he saying that? Why did he tell her such things? She shook her head in protest. No, he was supposed to be revolted by her. He was supposed to find her horriffic and beastly! "Don't..." She whispered as he leaned in for a kiss, but she could not resist. No, not him.

Returning the kiss whole heartedly, when he reliesed her she began to shake her head. "No, no, no..." She whispered again and again. "I've tried so many times... Always to fail. You know the pain I bring... The death. I can't stop it... Well... I can only stop it in one way. Will-" No... She couldn't ask that of him... She could not ask him to stay with her to the end. To hold her as her body died one more time, for the last time.

She reached up a hand to touch his face ever so slightly. "If you love me... Forget me... Forget you ever knew me... Please... I beg you Ambros... All I want is peace..." She had found it for just a moment in his arms... But how could she kill the evil lurking in her? She couldn't. She tried, but she never could... It was hopeless.

Ambros sighed as he listened to Allie. He hated seeing her like that. He put a finger on her lips. "Whatever happens I'll be here for you. I'll do my best to help you through this." He smiled warmly at Allie, "If you die now then you won't know if you can destroy the demon inside you." He started walking again gently guiding Allie. "Let me make it up to you for my failure three nights ago. Let me help you with the demon." He remembered that there were blood tears running down his face, and quickly wiped them away with his sleeve. "Well now both of us need to feed." He kept on walking with Allie. Ambros could smell blood, the blood from a human who was quite close to death.

"Ambros... No..." She whispered. Did he not understand? She had talked about taking her own life to save others so much, did he think that she wouldn't do it? It was the least she could do... Her last act of goodness. To remove the evil that she caused.

"Ambros... You did not fail me... I was the one who dissapointed you... I have not been able to be strong enough on my own to defeat this monster... And every time I try to grow stronger, it strikes." She said in her soft, trembling voice.

She pulled away from him, shaking her head as he said they needed to feed. "No... I cannot Ambros... Just one more night... Then all my pain will be gone... If I feed I will kill, and I will not stop. You know that with all your heart... I will kill more than just one or two... Maybe as many as five..." She shook her head again. She woudl not have that blood on her hands again.

It was a blessing her senses had dimmed. She could not smell the blood, could not smell the death.

Ambros looked at Allie with concern showing in his eyes. "That's why I'm here." He was the one who failed Allie, when she needed his help he wasn't there, and he couldn't suppress the demon. He sighed and picked Allie up carrying her on his shoulders. "You know that dying won't solve anythiing, death is a natural part of this world. Everyone dies eventually, but if you want to atone for those you've killed, killing yourself won't solve anything. You'll die with your heart filled with regrets, and the uncertainty of what would happen if you hadn't decided to take your own life." He remembered the night he was turned, he wanted to die, but somehow he couldn't let himself die. If there was an afterlife the uncertainty of his future would've driven him insane.

"The one I sense is close to death, and it'll end the human's suffering." He walked down the block and turned on to the next street heading towards the accident. "You must understand that the demon is a part of you, and will never go away. The only way to cope with it is to limit your feeding. You know how thinking of Josh helped you? Keep memories of what good happened in your life close to your heart." He thought about Cecelia. She was the only one who helped him control his own inner demon. "Keep the person you love close, and nothing can harm you." The scent was getting stronger, and he saw the accident, an overturned car with a woman pinned underneath it. The car crushed her lower body, and moving the car would kill her. She would die either way, but only Allie and him could grant her a peaceful death. "This is your chance to atone for your sins, help those who are suffering pass on." He put Allie back on her feet, and waited for her to move.

She was to weak to fight as Ambros tossed her over his shoulder. It even physicaly stunned her a bit, leaving her in a slight daze. "It will prevent my bloodshead. It will save the lives of those I may kill." And why did it matter if she died with regrets? What would it matter when all she was was dust among the earth? If there was a heaven or hell, and assuming she had a soul, she knew where it was going...

She heard noises, and there was a faint scent in the air...one she knew... But she could not yet identify it. She tried to move to see, but she could not look over her shoulder. But as he set her down she saw the sight and gasped. "Oh my God..." She collapsed in horror, petrified on the ground where she sat.

"Ambros can't you save her?" She looked up terrified. "Death can't be the only way! You can save her!" She insisted. But she would not feed. Her mind was made up. Nothing Ambros could do or say would change her mind. Only cayse her more sorrow before she found her peace... Could he not see why she was doing this? All the lives she could save just by ending her own? No. She was so close to the end... All she had to do was make it home, and she could die peacefully in her sleep... Just as she wanted when she was alive...

"I cannot do what you ask of me Ambros... I cannot."

Ambros shook his head as Allie asked if there was anything he could do. "I can't change the woman unless she accepts it." He watched Allie with eyes full of concern. "The woman won't accept the change. The life of a vampire is very hard if not terrible. Once you learn to control your thirst it will become easier, but if you're going to give up before you even start, then I can't help you." His eyes hardened and became much colder as memories of everything he went through. "It's your decision Allie, and I can't change it. You can't die regretting what you've done." He knelt down next to Allie. "Don't you want to atone for the sins of your demon? Dying won't do anything, and all that you'll remember when you die is regret. The regret that forms when you know that there is a path beyond the bloodshed that is within your reach. You've got to reach for it yourself."

He stood back up and turned away from Allie. "I love you Allie, but right now you've got to make your choice, die regretting not taking action when you can, or live and atone for the sins of your past."

"I can't control it!" She sobbed in a hoarse whisper. "He did something to me Ambros! Everytime I remember Josh, you, or any of the few good things from my life it only gets worse! This hate, this anger wells up in me. I would only kill more! I don't know what he did... I can't remember what happened afer he caught me... not untill I was face down in the snow..."

Her head hung low, her eyes on the pavement. "If I kill the monster I will have attoned from my sins, avenging the deaths... I will have given justice to the families by making sure the monster is dead. And there's only one way I can do that Ambros... I don't want to die... I want to live, honest... But I can't live with this monster within me... I live every day with regret... And I can make amends, I can save innocent lives from my horror..."

Her speech seemed to wear her out however, for as her eyes fluttered closed she slumped on the dirty pavement. The true hunger had set in, shutting her body down as if to make it last longer... Just as it had the night of their first meeting.

Ambros turned to face Allie, he understood everything she said, but he didn't believe it. The monster could be controlled, it had to be controlled. He couldn't fail Allie like he failed Cecelia. Ambros knelt down and picked Allie up in his arms. He walked right next to the woman who was suffering, and sobbing.

The woman looked at Ambros pleading. She didn't want to suffer anymore. "Please."

Ambros gazed at the woman. "There's only one thing I can do for you. I can only end your pain." He leaned in and let his fangs pierce the woman's neck. She gasped as he took her pain away. Once the woman passed away Ambros had a mouthful of blood, and kissed Allie letting the blood from the woman flow down Allie's throat. "Forgive me Allie. You must feed." He closed his eyes and held the kiss for a long time. He separated and watched Allie.