Amara was sulking, as she often did, at the bottom of the steps leading up to the library. She had been too late to make it in. Damn the sun. Next time she would have to get up early and bring an umbrella or something. She was sure she could get through the sun that way. Either way, she hadn't managed to move herself from the bottom of the steps.

What she had seen the past few days and blown her mind. She had come to do some research, since she had no place of her own, but she forgot that mortals had "closing times" and she also forgot how much it sucked. She wasn't in the mood to hunt, though her face showed that she needed it. She was stressed, slightly confused, and definately bipolar. Perhaps a drink would do her good.

Amara stood up. She had worn only a pair of dark jeans and a white t-shirt. Something unreadable was printed in the corner. And, amazingly, she wore a pair of yellow flip-flops....something she had never done before. But she had realized, after she put them on, that she had liked the feel of the air on her toes. Besides, getting clean socks was starting to become a problem with no place of her own.

Ugh. She began to walk down the street, visibly frustrated with herself and the way things were going. A significant personality change had gone through her, though not enough. She still had a dangerous habit of getting rude and snappy and she still hunted the way she had before. Not that it was a bad thing, she was rather glad she could still do these things....but it was the guilt that was starting to get to her. That was the bad thing about caring for a mortal, or for anyone at all.

Amara reached up, pulling her blonde hair into a hair-tie. It didn't help. Loose strands still hung in her blue eyes. She blew them away lazily and continued walking. It was going to be a long night.

Jaxon was on the hunt... Drake was somewhere in the city... But it was a big city still... And she had only caught a trace of him at the library... And she was in there now...She had broke in of course. She had her badge on her though should anyone ask, thus her ass was covered. She still had to use the back entrances, but she still got in no problem. She was just leaving however after losing his scent, climbing almost expertly down the wall, head first.

It was a rather thrilling experiance all things concitered, but even more thrilling what what she saw when she looked out towards the street... The blond hair and blue eyes of that vampire... The one who had first attacked her. She could never forget those eyes. She lept from the library wall to the wall of the next building, watching the woman... She did not know the vampires name... Their last meeting hadn't exactly been an exchange of pleasentries after all... But this vampire was beautiful...

She could not say why, but the way she carried herself, the look in her eyes... She was troubled though. Jaxon could read that on her face clear as day.

Leaping from the walls and landing catlike on the ground she stood. "So... I see we meet again..." She whispered from the shadows of the ally as the woman passed by. "But now... You seem troubled..."

Would the vampire recognize her? After all even as Jaxon lay dying the woman seemed to have some sort of emotional attachment....

Amara had a sense that someone was following her, or at least watching from afar and her first thought was that it was Dryden, but she wondered why he would care to stay hidden. Afterall, he had no reason to anymore. But a few more seconds confirmed that it was not him, but a familiar scent. She couldn't place it, but it was vampire, which was somehow odd to her. As she walked, she ignored it.

Instead, she looped her hands in her belt loops and continued walking. Her back was straight, her head held high as if daring the world to challenge her. Of course, she probably had enough challenges as of late, but she in public she never broke character. Though, if one were to look at her closly, they would see a very troubled woman. No one ever cared to look that closely. Her Nazi tattoo was the first, and often last, thing people noticed. Not that she cared. At least not until recently.

Finally, the shadowing scent that was following her became clear. Jaxon. Immediately Amara's demeanour changed. Her eyes narrowed, her confusion evaporated, and a sly grin crossed her features. She dropped her hands to her side.

"As do you, fledging."

Amara reached up, touching the girl's chin to turn her face this way and that.

"It looks like someone got to you before I did. Looks like I don't get to keep my promise after all."

So she did remember her... That thought made Jaxon smile. The woman's touch, as her fingers met Jaxon's face and chim were as soft in what she had thought a dream before. "Nothing I cannot handle myself..." Her voice was soft under the gaze of the vampire. But the woman's words comfused her. "Promise?" She echoed. "I'm sorry... That night was... very much a blurr... I woke up thinking it all a dream... Not until about a month back did I find out it was no dream..." She said. Now she thought of it... Why had this woman not turned her? Was that what she had promised?

"I was made to save my life..." She explained, her voice still quiet. "Not the night you attacked me but... The sire of my sire was the one who killed me... But Henri saved me... Well... I suppose he saved me..."

She looked up into those odd pale eyes of the vampire who had nearly taken her life... "What is your name... You nearly killed me that night... I think you owe me that much..."

Amara let her hand drop to her side, her eyes taking on an amused look. Of course, she had lost a bit of blood that night.

"Well, if you really want to know I promised to finish you off. I suppose someone has already done it, though. No hard feelings?"

She rolled her eyes and shrugged. But her eyes once again narrowed at Jaxon's last comment. She owed no one, except for maybe Dryden.

"Let's get one thing straight, sweetie, I don't owe you a thing. You're one of us now and the fact that I am letting you stand here in front of me should be enough. You know what it's like to kill now, so you know the sort of position I was in...even if you don't kill the way I do. I'll also have you know that I never kill without giving my victims my name, but I didn't kill you, now did I? But, since you are like me now, I suppose I can tell you my name. Amara, and you'd better not forget it."

Who was she kidding? Owe her? No way. She should be glad she wasn't dead now, in the sense that she no longer thought or walked the earth.

"I already know yours, Jaxon, so let's not pretend to be exchange pleasantries. I'm not friendly, but you already know that, don't you? You're welcome to hang around, but it doesn't mean I'll acknowledge your presence, got it?"

Amara's bright blue eyes moved away from Jaxon's face and looked past the fledging. Okay, so she was being a bit cruel, but if felt nice to be herself. Ugh, except for the guilt. What was with her? Still, her cruelty didn't spawn from hatred today, but really her own frustration. She had nothing against the girl that was standing in front of her, and she had nothing against her before when she wanted to kill her. Except for maybe the fact that she had managed to get away.

"Well, are you coming?" Amara asked as she began to walk away. So, she wasn't a complete bitch.

"Amara... Almost as strange as my own... Though I still think mine wins." She said with a weak smile. But she soon looked at the ground, almost fearful of this woman. She was not as old as Henri... But she was vicious... dark... Amara...

She looked up again and the woman was walking away. But the fledgling felt compelled to follow. Amara was younger physicaly than she was... Maybe about twenty or so... No more when she was turned it looked like... She was tall, beautiful, proud... Jaxon could be concidered beautiful, all the guys on the foice always told her so, but this woman had a different beauty... A traditional, ever-lasting beauty... Tall, full womanly figure, long blond hair, ensnaring eyes... Even Jaxon had to admit she was beautiful...

Besides, she had questions that she wanted answered. "I.... I'm sorry for shooting you and all, even though it didn't do any serious damage I know it hurt like hell... But I guess I just wasn't ready to die that night... But..." She hesitated before asking her question. She knew it would only annoy Amara... But she had to know.

"Why didn't you kill me or whatever? I mean... All I remember... your fangs... They were so soft in my neck... You were gentle, holding me to you as I weakened. I wasn't afraid to die then... It was just... Peaceful..." It was the chace that had frightened her. Once she had been caught, feeling the fangs in her neck she had relaxed... The woman had been so gentle...

Amara turned around to face Jaxon, her eyes meeting the fledgings once again. The girl was pretty, different from the girl she had seen not too long ago. She looked stronger now, and her new found life had brought beauty to her that Amara hadn't noticed before. And she had to admit, Jaxon had fought like hell that night. She had guts, which was more than Amara could say for most of her victims. That was what Amara liked about Jaxon. Even now, standing before her, despite what she could see in Amara's cold eyes, she wasn't afraid to ask questions of her. Or to treat her like an equal. Amara could deal with that...for now.

"Don't apologize. It's instinct. You were stronger than you looked. More than I thought you would be...for sure."

A compliment coming from Amara.

"Most of my victims struggle so much that it ceases to be a beautiful experience for them. I've learned to thrive off of fear, instead of feel guilt from it. You, however, were different. Afraid yes, I could see, but you held your own well. At the same time you feared for your life, you also knew when to let go. It caught me off guard, I suppose. I didn't finish the job as fast as I should have, and I was distracted by a certain friend of yours. However, if it means anything, I'm glad I did not kill you that night."

Amara liked the curiousity in Jaxon, her unceasing questions running through her mind. She was ready to learn about and embrace her fate. The same as when she thought she would die. That is what Amara admired in Jaxon. She could possibly work with a fledging such as this.

((Sorry distracted post. I was writing and then I accidently erased it all and had to write again. Haha. And That Seventies Show is on))

"Growing up I had to be..." She said simply. The woman didn't need the details, basics would suffice.

She listened though as Amara gave her own recount of the incident. As an officer, she liked the different points of view... It helped to paint the whole picture. "Yes... I knew I couldn't fight... I was strong... but not strong enough... And I was sort of stunned that... Welll, vampires actualy existed..." She said with a sheepish grin. I mean untill then I thought the same thing everyone else did... They were just stories... And after you had taken so much... I just felt... tired. Like I wanted to sleep..." She said her eyes drifting to the street, remembering that night.

Jax couldn't help but look back up as she said a friend had saved her... Friend? She had no friends... Mitch couldn't have possibly helped... Amara would have killed the both of them... That man... in the bar that night... Burton? Was he... "He was a vampire too..." She whispered as the thought came to her. But had he offered to walk her home to protect her, or to kill her... Obviously protect if he had protected her from Amara...

She gave a faint smile as the girl vampire complimented her. Well, I guess being glad that she had not been killed was a compliment. "Sooo... I guess that means I at least look like I'm turning out to be a decent vampire." Jax chuckled. "I guess I can thank Henri for that... Even though... I dunno... I mean it's just... Strange... Pulled into this compleatly new world because of a stupid, century old feud?" That's what it had been right?

"Anyway... Every time I fed... I always try to make it like you did for me... The way I remember it..." She gave Amara a smile. "Soft and gentle... That they die in the same peace you gave me... Even if I didn't die..."

Amara listened, nodding. Most people did believe that vampires did not exist. However, those like Jaxon were fortunate, or unfortunate enough to find out the truth.

"Yes he was. He must have liked you very much, though I doubt he could have stopped me. My own sire was really what ended it."

She rolled her eyes, a cold look coming across her face. Oh how she hated that man. He was so good at that...interfering with her life and she hated him for it. Why couldn't he just let her do as she pleased?

"It's going to be different for a while. That's the way it always is. Some vampires never get over it, but you seem to be one that is able to accept your destiny."

Hearing her say that she tried to make it gentle, as Amara did, made her smile. Amara never tried. Of course she had when she had first been turned, but after a while it got dull. It took so much energy to calm one down on her part, because of empathic abilities. Though, if she learned not to scare them first, it probably wouldn't be a problem but old habits die hard. She couldn't stop killing out of anger, even as her anger had begun to fade.

"When my victims feel pain, so do I," Amara admited, "The only time I seem to be able to control their thoughts along with my own is when they are afraid. It's in our nature, in my nature. Fear makes it easy to forget what it feels like to be calm and easy to forget trying."

She hoped that made sense. It wasn't often she admited her faults to an almost stranger.

She noticed the look of irritation as she mention her sire. And only a soft 'Oh.' came from her. But Jax knew it was best not to interfear with the personal lives of others. So instead she commented on what Amara had said of fear.

"I've lived my life in fear... It's nothing new... Which is why... I think I sort of wanted to die... I was tried of running from it... I wanted to die... but I wasn't ready..." Jax shook her head. "Well, what you said made more sense than what I did." She gave a sigh.

"Fear makes me remember... Remember things I don't want to. Even if I'm afraid for a totaly different reason, those things come back. So I've learned to just... Let go of the fear if it's not helping me..." There had been plenty of times when fear had kept her alive. Well as a human. It heightened her senses, made her more aware of things around her, almost made her know things before they happened. Where to shoot, if there was an ambush waiting... Where someone was hiding...

She shook her head. All that didn't matter anymore. She no longer needed fear to guide her like that. She had something better, more relieable.