Keye picks up the phone slowly. He's nervous--it's a bit scary to be calling someone you've never met, who may or may not have even ever heard of you, especially since Ant really didn't say anything about his sister aside from that she'd be helpful.

He takes a deep breath, hopes to god he doesn't stammer, and hits the call button.

"Hello, this is Sam Tucker."

The voice on the other end is clipped, because this is her professional side - she has her number listed in a few places for child care, and she gets calls from strangers about once or twice a month.

She sounds, well, very preppy. Jetta's type of girl. Which she is, when they run into each other. She's been in Bayfield almost a year, and while she certain hasn't gotten all that much better with strangers, she's a more socially-acceptable bad-with-strangers these days.

"Um..."
Oh god.
She sounds scary.
He is so glad she can't see him right now. Girls who sound like that usually hate him on sight.
"Um, h-hi, I'm...uh, m-m-my name's K-keye Tomlinson, and um...um, I'm a friend of J-jeremy's? Your b-brother? An...anyway, I...I'm w-watching this kid--m-my friend's, um, cousin? Over the w-weekend. And I've, um. He's around f-fifteen or fourteen. I've, um, never done it before. And he s-s-said I shoud call you and ask for some advice? I, uh, I'm s-sorry to bother you..."

So much for not stammering.

She swears inwardly, and settles down to be very patient.

"Have you met the 'kid' before?"

Does the kid have a name?

She is being patient. She is going to be patient if it kills her. Her brother actually doesn't have many friends (as far as she knows). She knows he's a social creature, but he's more the meet someone, have a great time, then pass them in the street kind of guy.

"W-well yeah! We're good friends. His name's Arty. A-arthur! I figure he's between twelve and sixteen? I mean, he acts...you know. He's a...he runs around, hangs with kinda a rough crowd? He's a...a little wild. And it's hard...y'know, to m-make him listen, 'cause he thinks he knows best. It t-took me a long-ass time to get him inside when he had a c-cold, and he was p-practically falling over, had a fever, and it was c-cold out, but he just d-didn't want to go in..."

He's rambling, isn't he? At some point, he realizes this and trails off.

"Right. Well, first off? Don't panic. Second off? Don't let him get away with dumbass stuff like that."

Blunt one, isn't she.

"You're standing in for his parents. That means you make the rules."

"Well--well yeah, but--"
It's complicated!
"Well...well he thinks he makes his own rules 'cause he hasn't got parents, and, um...um..it's kinda weird. I mean, he's not totally...normal. You know? I mean, he's just a person now, human and all, but..."

...oh.

"Okay, so the weirdness quotient is higher than normal?"

Hm. Weirdness in a kid. Well, she hadn't had any of that except for Laelia, but she was just adorable, so it didn't count....

Interesting!

"He's um...I dunno if I can explain. But yeah. Way higher."
There's the slight, harsh noise of the person on the other end drawing in a deep, shaky breath.

"But he's a kid now, huh? So it matters little why he's a kid, you still treat him like one. And kids need rules."

Zoom, she is opinionated.

"So, um, what you're saying is...uh..be...firm?"
That makes sense, right?
Act like you know what you're doing, and people will listen to you.

...that could be easier said than done.

"Exactly," she confirms. "You think you can do that?"

She's treating him like a nervous child now.

"I think..."
Wait a second!
"Hey. I'm twenty-one, you know. I've just never done this before."

Grin.

"Yeah, I get that. It's just, you're friends with my brother, how mature can you be?"

Joking.

Mostly.

(Her elder brother. She's being unfair.)

"The fuck does that mean?"
There's no venom. He's just...confused. What a weird joke.

Chuckle.

"Brother dear isn't the most mature person in the world. Surely you noticed?"

"Not...really."
He's not immature, just a liar. Two very different things.

"Well, anty darling can be tricky." (Read, you didn't notice because he's good at hiding who he really is from people, even 'friends'.)

Note that her pet name for him involves being very, very condescending.

Be unsurprised.

"Sure." Matter-of-fact.
Lots of people are tricky.
Ant is tricky because he's a liar, but Keye can deal with that, and so looks past.
Alexander is tricky because he's a very sweet man...to Keye, and otherwise tends to have a murderous temper, and...let's not think about that, eh?
Benji's tricky too, because he gets in those moods and he's hard to deal with, and well, Keye is hard to deal with too, and when you put two hard-to-deal-with people together...
Even Violet is tricky, because she gets mystifyingly touchy sometimes.
And Arty? Arty is way tricky.


Speaking of things that start with A and end in Y...
"Anty?"

"Anty? Ant? Anthony Jeremiah? Any bells ringing?"

And this is why he doesn't use his first name.

Of all the nicknames? Ant.

"Jeremy."
Keye likes Ant better than Tony.
"Why d'you call him Anty or Ant? That's the name of a bug."
The author would like to note that they taste bitter, also.

Heh.

"Well, he does have ant-like qualities."

Bitter, huh?

"Like what, antennas and extra legs I don't know about?"

Why would you call your brother an ant? Why? He can think of no reason.

Grin.

"Oh, I don't know... just... it's just his name."

She has no logic to back it up with. None. Poor her.

"No it isn't."
If Keye sounds a little over-aggressive, it's because he's confused.
"His name's Anthony. Or Jeremy."

Sigh.

"I appreciate that he's your friend, but he's my brother. He's been ant longer than I've been a part of the family."

"That's 'cause the family's fucked."

You know, that's the sort of thing you should avoid saying to strangers.
But they're making Ant be with Jetta!

...pause.

"Excuse me?"

That is her family. Hers. Not his. He does not get to critisize them.

...oops.

Unfortunately, he's already built up a head of steam.
"Well if they weren't, they'd know to keep their kid the fuck away from Jetta Widow."

"And what, exactly, is wrong with my best friend?"

She's exagerating. She and Jetta barely talk.

Keye's got her back up, is all.

"Jesus."
The family really is fucked.
"She's fuckin' evil."

"And you are one to talk why? She's a lovely lady, with a lovely daughter."

She mostly sides with Jetta on accounts of Jetta's little girl. She loves that little girl.

"Laelia's sweet, yeah. Ever wonder why she didn't keep 'er?"
Who could give up a baby like Laelia, hm?
Only someone evil.

She has to pause to collect herself.

"You are entitled to your opinion," she states evenly. "But keep it far away from my friends and family."

Fair?

"Be it on your own fuckin' head."
He doesn't think he likes Sam.
...but that's fair enough.
(Except if he doesn't warn them about Jetta...not his business, not his business...)

"Bye."

Pause.

"And good luck with the kid."

"...thanks."
Deep breath. Chill. Relax. Stop shaking.
"Bye."