Silas was looking better, and feeling a little bit better. He still didn’t know what was going on, why he was alive, if he’d remain alive. He’d gone to an underground doctor, a wererat that Pierce took Dagger to (because Dagger hadn’t been able to control his shifts in early years and a Doctor might find that a little strange) and he’d explained what happened. The doctor checked him out and told him he looked fine, everything was functioning normally, he couldn’t be sure that Silas was going to stay alive but that would be his general guess.

He was now going back to the cemetery like he’d told the woman that was living with Pierce he would do. He was going to beg her just another week, don’t tell him. He knew it would be fruitless but it was worth the meager attempt. The doctor also, being an old friend, told him that she wouldn’t tell Pierce until they found out if this was perminate or not, then gave Silas some money and told him to come back to her house after he bought some clothing.

He’d done so and showered and slept and researched at her home. Now he was in the cemetery in a pair of white dress slacks and a teal button down shirt that made the already amazing blue of his eyes shine brighter. He had a silver necklace, though the silver burned, around his neck with two rings on it. His white hair was combed back and put into a neat ponytail and he was standing at the end of the grave marked his, one leg cocked, his arms crossed, a deeply thoughtful look on his face. He still couldn't shake the strange feeling. Someone else was lying where he should be and he doesn't even know who it is.

She had waited anxiously for the week to hurry by. She gave the excuse that she was just worried about her beast coming and going as it pleased. That was only partially true. She was far more anxious to return to the cemetery to find out if Silas was there or not. She'd given her word that she wouldn't tell Pierce for now. She wasn't going to be able to keep it to herself for much longer.

Tonight she is wearing a gypsy style skirt that flows around her ankles, a pair of white flat sandles and a white tank top button up blouse. Her hair is brushed neatly and pulled back into a pony tail. Hard to believe that this woman was the same one who had met Silas in this very place but a week ago.

"You really are here..." she said as she neared.

He'd smelt her comeing, the he'd heard her, even over the smell of fumes put into the city air by cars and garbage, even over the sound of the cars, the people, music, the city in general. Then he tasted her. Her and her wolf. His wolf stirred, but he was no longer paniking and so it no longer had a good chance of escaping without the aid of the moon.

He let her speak and then finally turned, a look of mild suprise and interest across his features at her words. Neither of them could be believed that they were the same people from a week ago. They'd both cleaned up, gotten some rest. In Silas' case, not much but it was something.

"Did you think I wouldn't come? Or did you think that I would die again?" Neither question was mocking. He was truely curious if she'd thought he would have stood her up, even after making her make such a promise. And really, he'd thought he might die again before then, but had she?

Her own wolf was always ever alert and present. Not in the sense that it was out but that it was now always near the surface and ready to come out at any given moment. The woman has no control over that. The beast does as it wants even when she, the human, doesn't want it to.

She let her mismatched eyes travel over the man briefly before returning to settle upon his face. "To be honest," she started saying. "I wasn't sure what to think." Her voice was no longer hoarse like it had been the morning he'd met her here. Her voice was naturally quite soft and gentle sounding. "I couldn't help but think that perhaps you wouldn't show." Yes. She's being honest.

Gentle like his? As stated before, he is the literal opposite of his best friend. Pierce's tenor voice has a close to bass undertone, his own tenor is nearing barritone and gentle. He stood straight, his eyes away from her and on a distant building while she looked him over, assessing him no doubt, compared to his very sad first impression.

He turned his blue eyes back to her when she spoke the truth to him. There would be no point in lying to eachother, animals can smell emotions, fears, lies, happiness. All of it. And so, lying to eachother would be like chasing their own tail. But he had a feeling she was just being honest.

"I would not do that." He didn't say 'to you' or 'to Pierce's love' or any of that mindless jazz. He said what he meant. He would not do that, to anyone. He would not give his word that he will be somewhere to meet them and then not keep his word. I don't think it's in Silas character, or in his heart, to bring himself to do that to a person, or really to lie at all.

"How....is Pierce? And Dagger?" True concern. Devotion.

Her head nodded briefly. "I see that," she said and continued to look at him for a few moments more before letting her gaze drift around. She'd not actually looked at the place the first time she'd been here. She'd been too distressed, too confused and far too upset to even really notice much around here. She hates cemeteries. They give her the creeps.

"They're fine," she answered. "Pierce was stressed and worried that night 'it' had taken off before the door could have been locked." She paused for a moment. "I have him lock me in so that 'it' can't get out and hurt anyone. 'It' has been gaining more and more control. Ever since I was..." She cut herself off. "Anyway, he's doing fine. Dagger is as well."

She shifted her stance ever so slightly. Moving the weight from one foot to another. "So..." she began again finally. "How much longer must I keep this a secret from Pierce?" Might as well get right to the point, eh?

He nodded. "I'll guess he goes with you too." Into the room, he meant. He could probably even have told her which basement Pierce took her too every full moon too. And why not, he'd been the first to start using it with Pierce. He'd come up with it. Before that, his beast had run free when it wanted. And then it started to get out of the room.

He watched her move, his blue eyes traveling downward to her feet, seeing the slightest changes, watching her look around the cemetery. She didn’t like it here, he didn’t mind it here. He held a hand out in the direction towards the path that wound out to the entrance. “Would you feel more comfortable walking?” He’s taken two steps backwards in that direction already.

He frowned just a little, knitting white eyebrows over his blue eyes. “I was going to attempt for another week. I think...I think that I’m going to try and find the man that did this.” This being not technically bringing him back to life. This would be switching his body with someone else. Disrespecting both of their rest. “I want answers before I make anything final, especially for those I love.” Those being only two people, Pierce and Dagger.

She nodded slightly as she returned her attention to the man in front of her. "Yes. He does," she confirmed. "Stays with me all night for three nights in a row." Three nights in a row being the night before the entire full moon, the night of the full moon and the night after the full moon. All three of those nights, her beast could come out and there was nothing at all that she could do to try to stop it.

"Yes," she answered and took a few steps towards the path leading out of the cemetery. "I don't like places like this," she said absently. Another week. Another week of keeping such an important secret from the man she loves and has given herself over to entirely. She didn't even try to keep the frown from her pretty face.

He nodded to the first part. "As I knew he would." Because Pierce takes this situation, treats it with as much seriousness that it is, devotes himself to people in a way that Silas hasn't seen of anyone else, ever, not even himself.

He turned and began up the path, walking at an easy, strolling pace beside this woman. And he frowned just the slightest when she frowned at his request, and then he nodded his head once solomly. "I expected that you would not post pone for another week, but it was worth the attempt. Perhapes just another two days then? Just give me the time I need to find this man. I know where he is, because I ran away from the place in daylight hours. It is just a matter of getting there, finding him there when I go."

He let the frown slide away from his face when they left the cemetery and he slide one of his hands into his pocket. "May I ask, since you know who I am, what is your name?"

The frown on her face did not leave but in fact, deepened further as she listened to him speaking. "Two days. No more than that. I've kept this from him long enough," she stated and continued to walk beside Silas. Her movement was not that of a mere human. Of course, to a mere human there would be nothing strange about how she carried herself at all. But for those who know what to look for, there was animalistic motion to her movement. Quite canine like. Her beast was fully awake and near the surface. It is her beast that is controling her movements at the moment. Since it is only controling her movement, she does not struggle with it nor fight it. For now.

"Ylva," she answered after a few moments. "Ylva Farkas. I am hungarian and scandinavian mix. Hence my odd accent." Why she went so far as to tell him this is beyond me.

"I understand," he replied, nodding once more, solomly, though he'd have prefered more time. He longed to see Pierce and Dagger as badly as she wanted to stop keeping this secret from them. But he couldn't bring himself to march into their lives from the dead if he was going to just die again when the spell, if that is what this was, wares off.

"Ylva," he tried. He said it wrong, just a little too little stress to the name and he apologised for the mistake. Then he tried again, getting it correct the second time. He walked for a moment in the silence before turning his blue eyes to her. "He does not suspect anything strange does he?"

She shook her head slightly. "I don't think so," she answered. "I think we're all too stressed out about this... thing... that lives inside of me. It comes and goes when ever 'it' wants to. Doesn't make for a very peaceful life." There was a touch of sadness in her voice as she spoke. "Other than that... No. I don't think he suspects." She paused for a moment and turned her head to look at the man she was walking with. "That is why I just can't keep this from him for too long."

Silas returned his eyes to the sidewalk. "You...He's helping you isn't he? Teaching you to try and control it?" He sounded a little startled that Pierce might not be teaching her. If Pierce wasn't trying to help her, then he'd probably just blown him in that he could help. But it didn't matter. He was sure Pierce was trying.

That is why I just can't keep this from him for too long.

"Because he doesn't suspect?" He sounded misunderstanding at this point. He would understand if she could not keep it secret if his friend, her love, suspected something. But he doesn't suspect. He was silent again, licked his lips hesitantly.

"I miss them."

She nodded. "Of course he's trying to help," she said almost defensively. "It's just... this... thing... isn't wanting to cooperate very well. 'It' shuts my mind down to the point of not really being able to hear what's being said." She sighed softly to herself. "I hate 'it'. I wish 'it' would just not be there anymore."

"I would rather tell him /before/ he starts to suspect anything than after," she said to try to clarify what she'd said.

"I understand." Ah! Theres the problem. The one that Pierce had been unable to understand when Silas had explained why everything wasn't working. She didn't want it there, and she focused so much on that thought that the wolf knew exactly how to push he aside. "Have you ever tried, it might sound stupid, but have you ever tried to settle with the wolf? Not make arangments but...to dominate it?"

He nodded when she explained what she'd meant by that. He understood that too.

She frowned as she listened. Her frown deepened further as he actually referred to 'it' as wolf. "Why?" she asked. "Why would I want to settle with 'it'?" she asked with distain in her voice. "I hate 'it' and wish 'it' was gone."

"Because, wishing that it will go away," he stopped walking but didn't turn to her. He just remained there in thought for a moment. "Wishing it to go away won't make it happen. Trust me. I wished for three years mine would go away." He turned towards her now. "Dominat it, think of it as a wolf and you as a bigger wolf. Dominating it and make yourself it's superior. Wishing so badly that it'll go away provided mine a window to get out of my mind. Now he can't go anywhere."

She stopped walking when he did and turned her head towards him as he spoke. "I... I don't know..." she said quietly. "I... I'm... scared of 'it'," she finally managed out in a mere whisper. At that moment, the beast inside was grinning ear to ear. Yes. She's scared of it. The beast knows this. The beast feeds on this.

"Try not to be." He replied in a voice that was more soothing then critical. "Fearing it makes it dominate. It can't do anything to you. Because it needs you to survive." His wolf stirred around again, sneered at him in his mind, he gave his head a slight shake to one side and ignored it. "Try reminding it that, see what it thinks about that. Without you, it would die. It wouldn't exist at all."

She shook her head slightly again. "I've been having these dreams..." she says softly. "In them... 'it' is stalking me... 'it' isn't living in me... 'it' wants to kill me..." Her voice held quite a bit of fear in it and quivered slightly as she spoke quietly.

"Those are just dreams." He replied calmly. "I used to have dreams like that. In the begining. Of it comeing out of my closet, crawling into my bed. But I would always wake up and run to my parents room." as though they had really cared why the poor child had been so frightened. "It finally killed my parents and the dreams kept coming. But I'm still alive."

He started to walk again then, though he kept looking at her with those drowning eyes. "Have you ever tried to reach it? When it wasn't trying to come out? Tried to comunicate with it?"

"I left before it could kill my parents..." she said softly and began to start walking with him again. She shook her head yet again. "No... I haven't... I tend to... ignore that it's even there when it's not trying to come out..."

"Don't. It's always going to be there. Even if you ignore it. Ignoring it gives it free range of your mind, free range to figure out how to get out next time, faster." He couldn't have left his parents when it was there. He became what he was at an age too young to really leave his parents. Of course, he was forced to when they died.

"Ignoring it won't help anything. Confront it." Frown. "But only if Pierce knows what your doing and he's there to help you control it if it comes out. Or I am. I will help if Pierce can't."

She had to wait several years after she was bitten to be able to leave her parents. But that's a long story. She continued to walk along beside the man that everyone thinks is dead with a frown on her face. "I... I don't know..." she finally said softly. "I'm scared of hurting him... Pierce that is. Dagger too. I... I would just die if something happened to either of them and I knew that 'it' was behind it..." She sighed softly. "I worry about him when he locks himself in the basement with me during the times that it's able to come out without me being able to even think about stopping it."

"Don't worry about Pierce. He can shift to whatever he wishes, and almost any size." He looked downward at the sidewalk again and raised his eyesbrows just a little bit. "He got bigger then my wolf, several times. And controled him. If he can do that, I'm sure he will not have much trouble with yours." He knew that he was of the larger wolves, he'd been informed many times by his wolf.

"But if you are worried for him, I could do it for you. The reason I suggest Pierce is because he can change whatever he wishes at will. I can partially change, my hands, my ears, my face, partially at will but once I let him out entirly, I can not regain control until he is tired."

"It used to come out in full wolf form... going on all fours," she tells him. "But ever since I was..." Pause. "It's been coming out different... Walks on two legs instead of four. Why would that be?"

"Since you were..........." He shook his head. "I can not say unless I know. But you don't seem to wish to say what. So I'll make guesses, but it's the best I can do." He warned her. He didn't need to tell her something and it be entirly wrong, just because he guessed without warning her that it was only a guess. He put his hand back in his pocket.

"I can guess that maybe it's power. 'Look at me. I can be a wolf even in your human form.' Or maybe it is because in this form it has the use of it's hands as well. That is why mine comes in that form. Because he maintains it's hands, can more easily attack."

"I... I was attacked..." she whispered as she dropped her head downwards. "I... was... raped..." She couldn't bring herself to say it any louder nor could she bring herself to lift her head.

He stopped again, his eyes widening just a little bit, becoming bluer. Something stirred in him, the beast. A soft snarl escaped his lips, and somehow, it was as respectable a sound as Silas himself was respectable. He shook his head in that one direction, just once, to shove it back. His hand came up, almost touched her shoulder and dropped back to his side.

"I'm sorry," and really, he was. But this explained why she had not wished him to touch her a week ago, even to help her. It must have been recent. "I am going to...assume Pierce knows? And I'm going to tell you then that is my best guess as to why it walks upright. It felt....violated, when you were. This way, it also has use of it's hands." His voice, his overall tone was more gentle.

She nodded her head ever so slightly. "Yes..." she said softly. "He knows... Every detail..." She was obviously not speaking of what the rape had resulted in. A low, yet deep, rumble escaped from deep inside of her as the thought of what the rape had resulted in. Her mismatched eyes became more canine like in appearance as she lifted her gaze towards the man briefly. She didn't fight it. At all. "The fool is dead," came in a snarling voice.

Silas felt his own beast stir. Shift, sneer.

shut up. It's not challenging me.

It is! Let me out!

No. You've had your fun for the month.

Before it could comment again he shook his head harshly and pushed the beastial thoughts out of his mind, or at least, to the very back of his thoughts. He returned his blue eyes to meet the mismatched eyes of the wolf.

"I figured as much. And I guess it was you who killed him. Am I correct?"

Mismatched eyes narrowed slightly. No. This beast is not sending out a challenge. It was merely coming forth to protect its host from having to bear the pain from that horrible night yet again. Even if its host wasn't aware of this.

"Yes," it sneered. "Would have make the fucker suffer had I not been so rudely interupted."

He was slightly startled by this. "Interupted? By whom?" A deep frown was creasing between his eyebrows at the thought, the horrible, terribly frightening thought that left a cold lump in his stomach at who might have interupted. He put his hands behind his back and folded them loosely there, attempt to look less and less threatening to the wolf or towards Ylva.

Lip curled back to show sharp canine teeth. It's a damn good thing that there wasn't much for human traffic at the moment since the beast was showing a little more of itself each time. "The one who takes care of her," the beast snarled in reply. "And the small one." This was one pissed off beast. Yes indeed.

"Dagger," he breathed the word. He wasn't worried about Pierce, the man could hold his own if he could hold his own against Silas. But Dagger. Pierce could protect him, but had he seen that happen? Had he watched what had happened? When Silas died, Dagger still hadn't understood the full impact of being a werewolf. Please don't let him have found out like that, he pleaded silently.

she's challenging us!

She is not!

She is! Look in her eyes! Look at her lips!

She is not! She's protecting her body.

She's issuing a challenge!

No!

He shook his head again, met the wolfs eyes without fear, since fear fueled them. And he did not truely fear her. "Calm yourself. I mean you nor her harm. Her caretaker is my friend."

The she-beast nodded slightly at the sound of the name. Her mistmatched eyes not once leaving the man. Almost as if reading his mind, but yet not since she was not able to read minds, she spoke again.

"Worry not," it snarled. "The small one saw nothing. The one who takes care of my host made sure of that."

No. The she-beast was not issuing a challenge. She was merely trying to protect her host from growing any further upset about things than she already was.

"Calm myself?" the she-beast snarled with an almost laugh behind her words. "I am calm. For now."

"This is calm? You've got my beast believeing you are challenging me." He shook his head. It isn't that his beast thinks she's really challengeing her so much as him wanting let out, since Silas has control over him again. Silas was immensly relieved that Dagger had seen nothing, though, at this moment, he wasn't going to question exactly how Pierce had kept Dagger from seeing it.

((blah! Crap for you.))

She sneered slightly and made an almost sick sounding laugh of sorts.

"Foolish one," she said almost mockingly. "If I were challenging, you would know it and would not have a chance to react." Or so she thinks anyway.

"Perhaps it is you who should be calming yourself."

She leaned in fairly close but yet not close enough to be touching.

"I can smell you wanting out..."

you would know it and would not have a chance to react.

He nodded calmly. "I understand." He did not protest or argue this point because he could not possibly know, not honestly know if she was or was not that strong. If she was or was not that quick. Experiance told him everyone and everything was different.

Perhaps it is you who should be calming yourself

"Perhapes," he agreed with her. Again, without fear and without argument. But then she leaned forward and he did not move until her words were spoken. And then he stepped back one step, never taking his hands from behind his back.

"He does want out," he answered for the wolf. Because it could not even rise to the surface to answer with the control he maintained.

The she-beast was quickly becoming bored with this man. There was no arguements from him. No fear. No nothing. It was quite irritating and even more boring. She stepped back slightly from having leaned towards the man. Her mismatched eyes still narrowed into glaring slits. She snorted once before speaking to him again.

"Catch her," the she-beast snarled. "She's going to fall..."

And at that moment, the she-beast withdrew back inside her host entirely. True to her word, the she-beast's human host began to stumble forward. Falling towards the sidewalk cement. The beast had given permission for her host to be touched...