How long had she been there? Just leaning against the wall of the broken down building two blocks from where her wounds had occurred. It was so hard to walk and each step felt like she must have walked a thousand miles, each step her feet dragged more and more until she couldn’t go any further. That was where she came to rest and remained. Face was deathly pale from sitting there for an hour just bleeding. Exhaustion was setting in quickly. She knew she needed to get to a hospital, but the distance was so far and she didn’t even know which way it was from where she sat.

Callie was quite a mess to look at currently. Hair was matted with blood that was drying in it. Holes were in each hand from where she had been nailed to the board and was still bleeding as well as the bullet wound in her shoulder. Her ankle was a bloody mess as well from where he had jabbed the knife in it, plus the cuts on her stomach and leg. Her pants leg was cut open, matching where the knife sliced her skin. Shirt was partially cut open though the fact that she had worn overalls made sure that it didn’t get completely cut off like it had the previous encounter. The girl sat there on her knees, her non wounded shoulder leaning against the wall as she stared blankly down the deserted street.

If she could think clearly, Callie would probably be concerned that Cecily was okay and not getting hurt too badly. She would have wondered if she would actually make it to a hospital before she bled to death on the sidewalk in an uncaring world. The thought of if Erik was in the hospital would have entered her mind. But no; none of these thoughts raced through her head. Lack of blood to the brain, as it was leaving her body, was causing her to feel dizzy and the sidewalk spin. Any remote chance of thinking seemed to escape her just as the vital red liquid exited her body to rest upon the cold and desolate sidewalk. The back of her clothes was completely soaked from blood from laying on that wretched table for over an hour. The smell of the place still was snared in her nostrils and made her want to vomit right then and there. But somehow she withstood the feeling of vomiting and stared blankly down the street. It seemed to go on forever the more she stared at it. Eyes shut as they desperately wanted to rest. It was so cold. Why was it so cold on such a hot day? She could only wonder if anyone would find her.

Lucifer looks like any other handicapped man would, but he looks so young it's tragic to think of what might have happened to him. Still he continued down the sidewalk in that awkward-feeling wheelchair, a stilled and blank sort of expression painted across that delicate face. It was such a hot day. Lucifer was just getting used to hot days in the confines of this damn chair as he watched people run, jog, play in the park, or go swimming. He'd taken what he could previously do for granted. Now all he did was try to get by through the day.

He hardly bothered with looking good anymore so had let his brown locks fall like a curtain around his neck, shoulders, and face. He had on his usual black t-shirt, since generally the boy didn't wear any other color.

His wheelchair clunked over one of the many gaps in the sidewalk. He smelled her before he saw her, rounding a corner and continuing to find it was not just the vile and foul stench of this area of town. His hands froze upon the wheels, eyes wide instantly. He knew her.

ScheisseGottinHimmelCallie. His thoughts smashed together until the final realization hit him like a ton of brinks. Callie? This was thought in a rather unbelieving and panicked tone.

"Callie! Callie?" He quickly rolled up further to where she was leaning on the broken-down building.

"Scheisse! Scheissescheissescheisse. Callie! Bist... Are you okay?!" No, of course she wasn't. Stupid question, Lucifer.

Already he was fumbling for his cellphone.

The clunking of the wheel chair could be heard as he rolled down the sidewalk. Breathing was slow yet peaceful at the same time. Head didn’t turn to see who was saying her name rather frantically. At least it didn’t sound like Logan’s voice. The last thing she needed was to have him end up looking for her again.

But the voice was still familiar. She recognized it even though only running into him once. It wasn’t all that long ago which made it fresh in her memory. Is she okay? Definitely not which was more than obvious.

It took a few more minutes to try and get her body to cooperate, but finally she managed to get her eyes to look over at Lucifer. He was fumbling with his cell phone, but that’s not what got her attention. Why was he in a wheel chair?

”Why…” Too tired to talk. If she’d finished that sentence she would have asked why he was in a wheelchair, but her mind and voice weren’t connecting at the moment. Eyelids blinked lazily before she rested her head against the wall as well.

"'A... 'Allo?" He asked as he put the phone to his ear and someone picked up the phone. "Ein.. einen Krankenwagen... bitte." Damn it all! This was not the time to be forgetting how to to talk in English! "Ambulance. Hilfe! Help!" He was having a hard time clutching the phone to his ear, looking down at Callie in a hopeless panic.

He listed street names as best as he could remember and when they said they'd be right over he shut off the phone.

"Callie... hang on, 'kay? Just stay awake... help's coming."

Help? Help was on the way he said. That sparked hope in her mind. Her prayer had been answered that somebody found her. Somebody did and was actually going to help her. Here on a desolate and deserted stretch of the more broken down side of town, none other than Lucifer had found her. Thank the gods. There was at least someone who was good at heart.

Eyelids shut and opened over and over again slowly threatening to make her fall asleep. The idea of staying awake was just so hard at this point. But she needed to, she had to. Hazel eyes just looked at the panicked and fuzzy form of Lucifer sitting in the wheel chair.

The next ten minutes seemed to last an eternity, but finally the sirens of the ambulance could be heard. Eyelids shut again.

Lucifer wanted nothing other than to just kneel down beside Callie and cradle her in his arms, telling her soothing things. Where was Erik? Why wasn't he here with her? Why didn't Callie already have help? Erik, he thought, would hurt so much if he knew what happened to her. Little did he know Callie had already been hurt and so had Erik because he couldn't have been there. Lucifer didn't know that. He just knew that Erik wasn't here now comforting his beloved. He frowned, bit the inside of his lip, wrung his hands, and watched Callie's eyes flutter oepned and closed.

The wailing of the sirens could be heard and Lucifer backed away so the paramedics could come in with the stretcher.

And all he could do was just hopelessly watch, serving no purpose.

The ambulance came into view finally and stopped on the street next to where Lucifer and she were. Eyelids fluttered open once more. Paramedics rushed out of the red and white ambulance as well as a stretcher being brought out. It’s amazing what people focus on when they really don’t remember or understand what was going on. Callie was actually focusing on their clothing for some odd reason. White uniforms with the Red Cross on the left arm sleeve plus being in front on a pocket of the jacket.

Putting her on the stretcher they loaded her into the back of the emergency vehichle and started tending to her injuries. One paramedic headed over to Lucifer instead and asked the few basic questions of if he knew her, how did this happen, was he riding with them to the hospital, etc.

Lucifer answered the paramedic's questions as best he could with simple yes and no answers, trying to still remain calm. She's going to be okay, she's going to be okay... he kept telling himself, trying to look into the man's eyes as he was being spoken to. Yes he knew her, no he didn't know what happened, and he'd have liked to ride with her in the ambulance but this wheelchair made it so hard to.

"No. I'll visit with her in the hospital. Just pleave save her, 'kay?" That was all he cared about at the moment.

”Will do our best.” The paramedic stated and then got into the ambulance and they hurried off to the hospital, sirens wailing the entire way.

Everything was so bright in the back of the vehicle. It also seemed chaotic with bodies moving about on either side of her making sure she was doing okay until they got to the hospital. Vision kept going from brightness to darkness each time she closed her eyes and then the paramedics told her to open them again to stay awake.

Arriving in the back of the hospital for the emergency room, back doors of the vehicle opened and she was moving again. Everything from this point on became kind of fuzzy in her memory. It all went by so quickly. She couldn’t even remember the doctor beside her asking questions. Like she was going to be able to answer anything at the moment.

Taking her to OR, they prepared to operate on her shoulder and ankle and stitch up the cuts and gashes as well as tending to her hands.

-----

It was the next day before she even remotely started to come around. She never had been good with anesthetics. More blurry whiteness greeted her as she stared around in her hospital room. The yucky paper gown was all she wore underneath the heavy hospital blankets. Even the pillow seemed papery. They expected people to be comfortable in these things?

Head turned to see a ton of equipment beside her bed and an IV running in her arm. The room still seemed to spin so she closed her eyes again. Eyelids were still quite heavy due to the medication plus pain killers they were sending through her IV. She drifted back off to sleep.

Lucifer didn't come to visit the first day she was in the hospital no matter how much he wanted to. He knew that he'd just have to sit and wait and then be told to go away when she was finally ready to be seen because she needed her rest. Thus why Lucifer had come in the next day she was there to keep her company, strolling in the hospital with his wheelchair.

He asked the nurse to see her trying not to sound too eager to see her when he got there. The nurse led him to her room.

It was a good thing that he waited for she had slept most of the day as it was. She probably wouldn’t even know he was really there or not remembered he had visited. Darn medications. Today was different though. She could actually see clearly and her bed was propped up so she could sit and barely see what was going on in the hallway as the nurse left her door open. However she couldn’t move too much though. Shoulder was wrapped up as well as her ankle and both hands. A bandaged area was on her leg and chest from where she was cut. Any more injuries and she might have looked like a mummy if someone pulled off all over her covers.

Hands were resting in her lap and eyes staring at them. She couldn’t feel any pain at the moment. Morphine did wonders with helping that out.

Head turned to look at the door when she saw Lucifer wheel himself in. A few emotions went through her at the same time just by looking at him. Nervousness, confusion and yet gratitude were all racing through her body. She did remember he was the one that had called for help and was glad of that. Otherwise she didn’t know what would have happened to her if she had sat there much longer.

”Lucifer.” A few more minutes went by in silence before a faint smile tried to work on to her face. ”Thank you.” But as soon as that exited her mouth her smile went away as she remembered Cecily had taken her place. Hopefully she was back home by now and healing after whatever Logan decided to do with her.

”Why are you in a wheel chair?” The question she couldn’t ask back on the street two days ago finally entered her mind and her mouth cooperated with letting the question know to him. In the end though she was just glad to see a familiar face.

Lucifer pushed himself further into the room and stifled a sigh, smiling faintly instead. "You look like hell..." he said softly, looking over at her bed as he was next to it. He watched her with her hands in her lap, trying not to frown. "Am I allowed to ask you how you feel... or do they have you on Morphine..?" He was trying to keep questions to a minimum but wanted to know how she was feeling.

"..." He opened his mouth to say 'anyone would have done the same for you' but found it wasn't true so stopped. "...you're welcome. I'm sorry about this. This shouldn't have happened to you... it shouldn't have had to." His green eyes held real sincerity and real understanding. He pushed pieces of brown hair out of his face.

His slender fingers rested on the wheels still and with a faint and sad smile tracing over his lips he shook his head. "This thing?" He patted one wheel with his right hand. "Let's just say it's my new permanent accesory. A birthday present. Don't worry about it. Just concentrate on getting better."

She tried to laugh when he commented of how she looked, but found it hurt her shoulder with the movement and so remained still. It took a few moments to process what he had asked, but finally she mustered up something to say.

”The room spins, when they add more of that stuff.” A finger was slightly lifted as far as she cared to move it and pointed at the IV. ”Makes me sleepy to.” Eyes looked him over as she laid there.

Nothing was spoken in reply to what he said about ‘it’ shouldn’t have happened to her. Callie didn’t want to talk about it anymore. It only made her feel worse and degraded. Twice she had been caught off guard and both of them horrible. No. It wasn’t something she wanted to talk about.

Hazel eyes traveled to his hand as he patted the wheel. Permanent? What had happened to him?

”I’m sorry.” Sorry for what? That he would never be able to walk ever again? Elaboration on the two words seemed to escape her at the moment. Instead she just let out a sigh and looked up at the ceiling.

"Mm.. well, you need your rest, Callie. I can only hope for a swift and painless recovery. And I'll come visit you when I can, 'kay?" He asked, wanting to reach out and hold her hand in his, but something was stopping him. It was as if someone had put up an invisible barrier that he knew was there so didn't dare cross it.

He didn't push the subject when she didn't reply. He'd probably wait until another day to ask more questions. He simply looked at her in sympathy, bright green eyes watching. He shook his head.

"No, don't be sorry. Don't worry about it... it wasn't your fault. I'll live. Right now I'm worried about you, honey."

”Okay.” She doubted she’d ever feel completely painless though. Physical pain wasn’t anything out of the ordinary in her life, but the emotional scars would last forever. There was no getting over those from everything that had happened to her. In fact she felt she’d been through more pain in the past month than any she’d felt in the past century. It only seemed to get harder. Things were so much simpler when she was with her mom, even if the beatings ensued.

Worried about her? Lucifer was worried about her? The words were so familiar to her ears yet at the same time foreign. It made her think about Erik again which only caused tears to well up in her eyes as she continued looking at the ceiling. Blinking once caused the tears the break free and flow down the side of her cheek.

”It is my fault.” Of course she wasn’t specifically talking about him being in the wheelchair. The word just sent signals to her mind that what happened indeed was her fault. Erik would still be with her right now if she hadn’t been caught off guard that day. It was her fault he wasn’t there anymore and the feeling seemed to eat away at her heart till nothing was left.

"Honey... I..." Lucifer offered pathetically with a frown etched upon his beautiful face. He reached for her hand finally, despite his better judgement. He bit his lip, not knowing what to say. "I'm so sorry, Callie."

He looked at the wall, away from her face for a moment.

"Where's Erik...? Why isn't he here with you?" The thought saddened him. He looked back down at Callie's hand.

"None of this is your fault. Don't blame it on yourself."

Eyes were drawn away from the ceiling to her hand as she felt him hold it. She wasn’t sure how she should respond to the gesture. There could be so many reasons for the simple gesture to occur and, as she found out, not all of them nice.

Hand withdrew from Lucifer’s own hand and turned to look at the wall on the opposite end of the room.

Hazel eyes grew a little bit wider as he asked about Erik. It only caused more tears and pain to build up in her eyes. She feared the worst had happened and it was all because of her. It was all her fault that he went out and, in her opinion succeeded, in attempting suicide. If she hadn’t let her guard down they might have still been at Cecily’s.

”I don’t know.” Voice was choked up and face was red. He’d have to lean closer to hear what she said no doubt. ”I think…I think he’s…..gone.” Hopefully he’d understand what that meant. She didn’t dare speak her assumptions out loud. The word just couldn’t be spoken; dead.

”It is my fault.” She stated with a louder voice this time. ”He’d still be here if it wasn’t for me. I let him down.” Gaze never fell to Lucifer as she spoke. They seemed to be fixated on the wall rather than the man in the wheelchair.

He tried not to cry, but that had hurt. That had hurt quite a lot, in fact. He wanted to know why he did such a thing... why he'd ever try to. He thought Erik was happy, damn it! How could he do this to Callie? How could he desert her and tear apart her spirit like that? How could he? Anger swelled inside his chest. Sadness shone in his eyes as her hand snaked away from his. He withdrew his own offending hand.

He didn't have to lean closer to hear what she'd said. His hearing was his best sense and he could probably hear a dog whistle if it were blown. He frowned.

"It's not your fault, Callie. It isn't. Please.. please don't think that it is... I..." what? What, Lucifer? You're sorry? That just didn't seem to cut it.

"Don't think he's dead... no, it's... impossible. Honey.. dear gods, he's alive. He.. has to be." But that was more of Lucifer's wish than his actual understanding and knowing. No tears came. Only immense and fullblown hurt. He was too shocked to cry just yet.

”Why shouldn’t I?” Why shouldn’t she blame herself? It was her fault and there was no changing her mind on that. She should have just stuck to the main streets or stayed around the flower shop until he got off. That’s what she should have done instead of go down the alley ways that day. None of this would have happened.

Attention was grabbed though as he said that Erik had to be alive. His wishful thinking was actually making her feel like he was alive as well. But she didn’t want to get her hopes up only to have them crushed again later. It seemed to be the most common occurrence lately. Build up her hopes, everything seems like its going good and then it all gets squashed again to make everything gloomy once more.

”You seem so sure.” She was looking at him again now only now her eyes were puffy from the silent crying she had done while turned away from him.

”It’s been four days since…since he left the note.” She had to think of something other than what else had happened. Callie was never going to tell anyone about that ever. Not after what happened after she told Erik. He left her. No. That information would not be spoken ever from her mouth. Not if she had anything to do about it.

"Because. Because it's not you're fault. Callie, I... please understand. It was his decision and... I..." he shook his head. "Don't insist that it's your fault. Please." He couldn't take it. "I don't want you to blame yourself. I don't blame you... I refuse to. Just listen." It was hard to keep from crying himself now. But no, Callie had to be more upset than he was. Callie was... she deserved more sympathy and comfort.

"I am sure. He'll come back. He will. Don't dare think otherwise." He was looking at the floor. He had to be alive, but he wasn't sure of himself at all.

It didn’t matter how many times he told her, she still was going to believe that it was her fault that he left. However it was a losing battle for her to try and convince him of what she already knew. So she stopped talking and listened to him talk. Squelching more tears was hard to do at this point. They seemed to come so easily anymore.

”I’ll pray that you’re right.” However she didn’t smile as she spoke or sound hopeful that Lucifer was speaking the truth. Head turned away from him again and looked at the other side of the room.

"I'm sorry I upset you. I didn't mean to. Please, just... I apologize. I truly am sorry. But... but don't worry. He will come back." This time he carried a tone that suggested he was more sure of himself.

"I hope you get better, Callie."

His tone was actually making her feel better though to a certain degree. Lucifer seemed to sure that Erik would come back which made her really think he would come walking in the door any minute.

”I want to see him but….I….I just don’t know….” Know what? That she wasn’t sure if Erik could ever look at her again after what she did? After she let that happen to her?

”I think I upset him.” The thought of it was making her cry more. Damn tears never seemed to go away; as if they were permanently attached to her cheeks. She blinked slowly and without looking at him spoke further.

”Do I really want to get better? It only seems to fall apart when it does.” The feeling of a person that has suffered too much for any one person to ever feel was present in her sorrowful voice. If she could turn onto her side at that moment she would; turn away from him and shut herself off from the world. But she couldn’t move. It would hurt her shoulder quite a bit. She couldn’t push herself up either into a better position as any pressure to her hands hurt as well. What a mess to be in.

Lucifer knew exactly how she felt. He himself had been in the same situation a couple days before. Remember, Callie? You were there when it happened. He looked sadly at her, biting the inside of his cheek. He didn't know what to do in this case.

He sighed and shook his head. "Don't say that. No matter how horrible it seems to be, there's always some hope that it will get better. Trust me." He knew. Even if it didn't look like he knew that it would get better, he almost knew it would. He was feeling quite terrible right now actually, but he was hoping it'd get better.

"If there's anything I can do to help you..." he sighed.

She doesn’t remember at the moment. A lot of things are racing through her mind and most of them were about her being hateful more towards herself than anything. So no, that particular moment has escaped her currently.

Shifting to try and get more comfortable in bed cause her face to wince as pain went through her shoulder and ankle. Bad move. No more shifting in place. Wait for a nurse. She hated the doctor though. It was a guy and due to recent events she had reverted back to being quite nervous around strange men. Only now she didn’t have her mother to help her out of situations like this like she used to. Gods what would her mother have said if she knew what happened? That she told her so? That she was right that men were bad and she shouldn’t have let her guard down? Just thinking about it was making her stomach churn into more knots.

”I hope….I hope so to.” She said as she looked at him again. He seemed so sure that everything would get better. But how come she still had that feeling that it wouldn’t?

Is there anything he could do to help? Perhaps…perhaps there was. ”You could….” She looked down for a moment. Should she really ask for him to do this? But didn’t he want to know as well? ”….find out if….if…..Erik is…” He could finish it in his head no doubt; alive or dead. It was eating her up inside not knowing if he had succeeded or not in his attempt.

It was because it had happened to her so many times. He knew the feeling. When you've fallen so many times and somebody promises you you won't fall again, it's hard to believe them. He knew that.

"If you believe it'll get better, it will." Not right away, but... wishful thinking couldn't hurt anybody.

He gave a nod. "Of course. If that's what you want me to do, then I promise to do so." Even though he was still afraid to face Erik again. No. He'd push that away for Callie. He had to know whether or not Erik was alive.

She offered a half smile to his saying that it will get better if she believe it will. Perhaps he could be right. But at the same time it to her it was like him saying ‘if you believe you can fly, you can’. However the notion that he was actually going to go and see what happened to Erik actually made her spirits lift, if only slightly. That slight lift became apparent in her hazel eyes. She could try and hide her emotions, but her eyes could never lie about how she was feeling.

”Thank you.” She was grateful for him even wanting to go look for Erik for her. ”I just….I just need to know. I mean….” She looked down again and let out a sigh before continuing.

”I know I did something awful. I’ll…I’ll understand if he never…never wants to see me again.” Needless to say more tears were occurring the longer she spoke, voice getting softer as well.

He threaded his fingers together and sighed. "I... I'll see. I won't promise anything, but I'll see what I can do,... okay?" He shook his head a little. "I know I can't convince you of anything. You have to believe yourself. I'll just do the best I can to help you, because that's all I can do."

He looked sadly down at her, to the wall, then back at her again. "I'll look for him... for you. Don't worry."

"You just concentrate on getting better."

Because it was time for Lucifer to leave. He'd caused enough pain as it was.

”Okay.” She whispered out. That was all she wanted, was for him at least look and try and find out what happened to Erik.

A nod of the head was given to him wanting her to get better. She would try with the hope of Erik still being out there. But at the same time it made her feel sick to her stomach. If he was out there and just hadn’t come back met he really was upset with her for being too trusting. It definitely wasn’t going to happen again though, not if she could help it.

That’s when the nurse came back in with a shot that contained additional pain killers. She hated them and yet at the same time liked them. It took the pain away, but it made the room spin every time right after it was put into her IV.

Eyes fell to the IV as she slowly injected the substance into it. Just like every time, a few minutes later her eyes felt heavy once again.

He smiled a little sadly, waved, then left and left the nurses to their work.