Well as I'm going to the conflict in 14 days I think that I should post the list that my army has evolved to because other people always have a fresh out look on the list.
Paladin : Knights vow, heavy armour, barded bret steed, enchanted shield, lance of the artois: 106pts (joins bannered Knights of the Realm)

Paladin Bsb: Knights vow, barded warhorse, gromril great helm, sword of might: 119 (joins unbannered unit of Knights of the Realm)

Damsel: Level 2, Scroll, chalice, warhorse: 160 (joins grail knights)

5 Knights of the realm: champ, musician : 127pts

5 knights of the realm: Full command and warbanner: 169

6 knights of the realm: champ:144

5 knights errant: 100

5 Mounted Yeomen: shields, standard: 94pts

3 pegi knights: 165

8 Grail Knights: standard, muscian: 334

Tactics are to generally bait on one flank and then concentrate on the enemies weakest flank to allow me to hopefully break and then get around them. So, any thoughts?

Looks strong. My only criticisms would be of your battleplan: you have that one huge unit of Grail Knights and then lots of the piddly little units, so you'll have a very hard time fooling the enemy about where your strongest attack is going to come. It's also a tad risky to have just that one big unit: if you run up against RBTs, say, then as soon as your Grail Knights are shredded you will have to pull of some very lucky/difficult manouvres to make a win of it. I understand that the characters are joining those two units of KotR, but you'll be starting 2 down against most infantry: except against pretty low-calibre troops, those units will have trouble actually making an impact in the enemy line.

But 9 man units of knights in the lance formation are so clunky, I haven't really had problems with the lack of power in 5 man units with a character. The battle plan works with all the knights of the realm and grails working togethor, the bait units are the knights errant, the squires and sometimes the pegis.

I'm not saying I don't like the little units: au contraire, I like them quite a lot, as they're vicious and manouvreable. What I was trying to say was that having so many little units and just the one huge unit (of Grail Knights, as well) makes it very difficult for you to actually feint on a large scale, as the Grail Knights will be the surefire indicator of where you're really planning to attack: the 5-man units are nice, but they're not exactly going to be bulldozing infantry blocks, so the enemy will be able to counter your plan effectively simply by watching the Grails. If it were me, I'd adapt the plan to incorporate this.

Good point, I'll try this now:
Paladin : Knights vow, heavy armour, barded bret steed, enchanted shield, lance : 88pts (joins 7 strong Knights of the Realm)

Paladin Bsb: Knights vow, barded warhorse swordof might: 94 (joins 7 strong unit of Knights of the Realm)

Damsel: Level 2, Scroll, chalice, warhorse: 160 (joins grail knights)

7 Knights of the realm: champ : 168pts

6 knights of the realm: Full command:169

6 knights of the realm: champ, muso:151

5 knights errant: 100

6 Mounted Yeomen: shields: 80pts

3 pegi knights: 165

8 Grail Knights: standard: 324

Thoughts?