Here are some stories I write with Shorty! Hope you like thems!^^ I take some parts out that don't make sence.


Once upon a time. wait a sec. that's no way to start a STORY!!!! eh. ok, here it goes.
why Cappy wears a hat (it's greeeeen).
Cappy's mother, Olivia was, uh, pregnant. (warning: kids do not try this at home...try it at the store, but not at home...) OLivia felt a jolt of pain shoot up through her SpInE thingy. She knew it was time for the dreadful trip to the hospital. Dreadful meaning, she had to go there, alone. All, alone(oooohhh). OLivia's husband had been, uh, mean. So, sadly he and Olivia had seperated:(.
OLivia started her trip to the hospitol. ooohh, hospital.
Olivia was afraid of pregnant ladies. She was afraid of pregnant ladies from the AWFUL incident at the, BLUE LAGOON. AT the BLUE LAGOON a pregnant lady and her husband were sitting in a boat driftin' away. Well, they didn't drift for long, after THEY TIPPED OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Well the lady being pregnant and all swam herself to shore, and found the Baby . . . GONE!! The Baby didnt fall out of her or anything. It was just, uh, gone or it disolved or somethin'.
So, well after that, Olivia NEVER like pregnant ladies or ladies getting pregnant or pregnant, ladies pregnant, uh yeah. Well, Olivia was REAlly mad at her husband for getting her into this mess. But, now she was kinda glad that she was pregnant. She told herseld that everything woulld be ALright.

By the time Olivia had reached the hospital. The doctors rushed her to the emergency room. Olivia PUSHED and PUSHED REAlly hard. she PUSHED and PUSHED some more.
FINALLY, the Baby was pushed outta her. except, there was only one problem.
THE Baby CAME OUT BUTT FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
well, the Baby was kinda stuck their. butt sticken' out and all.
SO, the docters came to the rescue. they pulled that Baby outta there. well, they tried to at least. the Baby sttttttttttrrrrrrrreeeeeeeetttcccccccchhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeddddddd (stretched) all the way across the room!!!(heheheheheheh)
that little brat was getting strecthed with its head still stuck!!!
Finally the Baby's head popped out and flopped around like a chicken.
the nurse took the Baby to get cleaned. yah, then she brought him back. the nurse gave the Baby to Olivia. Olivia smiled.
The only problem was that she didn't have a name to put on the birth certificate.
THEN Olivia's husband slammed the hospital door open. "GIMME THAT Baby" he yelled.
"NO!!!!!!!!!" said OLivia

Olivia was so mad at what the husband had done to her in the past. and did to her,. or was doing to her. SO, she kicked him in the groin, poured kerosene on him, and lit him on fire!!!! YAY!

So, back to signin the certificate. SHe looked at her Baby and notice a chunk o' fur outta his head. Apparently from being stretched so long his fur got pulled off. So, the doctors had given Olivia a green cap to cover that eeeuughh spot.
Olivia knew just the right thing to name him. Cappy. awwwwwww
THE END


"NO IT ISN"T!!!!!! yelled Cappy, THAT'S NOT HOW IT WENT MASHIMARO!!!! tell the truth!"

"SHUT UP! YOU SMELL ODOROUS OF FEET!!!" said mashimaro

"I'M TELLING ON YOUUUUU!!!" whined Cappy.

"GET AWAY FROM ME YA LITTLE FEETUS" screamed mashimaro.

Okay, this is the REALLY weird story of why Maxwell's head is so LONG! MAN! he has a longhead (told by MashiMaro) warning: this story may disturb you so severely that you can not . . . . CHICKEN!

Once upon a time. no, foot. no day. eh. Maxwell's parents owned a Lumber Company. They had the ONLY Lumber Company in the whole WORLD! (eh, hehe) So, of course, havin' the only Lumber Company and all, they had a lot of buisness. The following day was the not so famous, bring your daughter to work day. well, as you can probably seeeeeee. Maxwell is a . . . BOY! Not a girl. Maxwell was so sad and all, (and also mad at that person who invented that day) that he started thinking. What if he WAS a girl?? then he could go to bring your daughter to work day and everyone would be all happy..

Suddenly this thought bubble popped outta his head with a little light bulb in it (for those of you who don't understand what's happening, HE GOT AN IDEA!) Maxwell wondered if he could MAKE himself look like a girl. Then he could miss skool and go to bring your daughter to work day. YAY! he thought. THAT'D BE, UH I DUNNO, UH VERY EXTREMELY GOOD. So, Maxwell went to work. if i put mixture a with b, he thought. will i look like a girl? Well, doin all the mathwork with his idea wasnt working out. So, he decided to just use some of his mothers' makeup. even though she doesn't have any. eh. So, in a few hours, uh minutes. Maxwell was now Maxinawell. HAHA^_^ The next day, Maxwell, i mean MAXINAWELL got to go with his, uh her parentals to the Lumber Company.

Since Maxinawells' parents didnt have a car, they called upon the GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIANT Apricot Of Happiness to wisk them away to a wonderful, magical land of chikkins and smelly toes. where everyone was sooooo happy and there were pancake people that sang: PANCAKES!! PAAAAAANCAAAAKES!!!! do not pour immitation syrup on us! only pour natural syrup on us! becauseifyoupourimmitationsyruponuswewillbreakoutin HIIIIIIIIIIVES!!!!!. Maxinawell was frightened by all this meaningfull nonesense, s/he forgot s/he was reallllly hungary. so when the Earth Mother heard hir prayrs, she rained down a flood of raddishes just for him, er..her. The raddishes were so big that they could just jump up, sprout legs and do a fancy russian jig! eh.

FINALLY, after years and years of traveling, they reached the Lumber Company which was across the street. Maxinawell was very, very happy that he, umm...she finally got to go to the Lumber Company, so s/he jumped up and down and break danced and then threw up(heh) AT the Lumber Companys' gate, all the workers greeted Maxinawell and her parental units. Everybody, and I mean EVERYBODY came up to Maxinawell and said how cute s/he were. Maxinawell was having the bestest day in hir life.....UNTIL that one dreadful moment(oooooh, dreadful...).....

Maxell had convinced all the peeps he was a girl, so he decided to go take a break and eat some stuff and go to the bathroom. BUT(big but...hehe) before he could go anywere, he saw something . IT WAS A LOG RIDE!!!!! y'know like the one at disney land....uh...yeah BUT(big but again...hehe)IT WAS'NT!!!! It was a log compressor!!!!!!!(NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!) And being the smelly little kid he was, he got on the log-compressor ride thing. WHEE! he thought it was so fun until(DUN DA DA DUNNN!!!!) he started going faster and faster and still, faster and then he got to the compressing part. and one thing leads to another, HE GOT COMPRESSED!!!!! OOOH, COMPRESSED HE DID GET!!!! and when he did come out he was all stretched out, or at least his head was. Well, after that s/he got back to normal, but hir head was still all long and stretched. Maxinawell went out of the room and everybody looked at her. THEY HAD NOTICED THAT HE WASN'T A GIRL!!! but nobody said anything about his long head... THEN one of the worker hams yelled "HEY!!!! that kid isnt a girl!!!! make him go back to skool!!!" Maxwell was very very sad about being found out he had forgot completely about going to the bathroom and went back to skool on the giant apricot that had brought him over there...AND that is how Maxwells head got to be so long. THE END

"MASHIMARO!! THAT IS COMPLETELY UNTRUE!!!! I WAS JUST BORN THIS WAY!!!" yelled Maxwell
"YOU SHUT UP!!! I AM A COP AND YOU WILL RESPECT MY AUTHORITY!!!" MashiMaro screamed back
"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!? YOU ARENT A COP, YOUR ONLY NINE!!!! " Maxwell shouted in rage
" GET AWAY!!!!!YOU SMELL LIKE FEET!!!!!" MashiMaro screamed again.


*apricot of happiness is the icecream man.....

THERE were two hamsters named Rachel and ummm......I dunno.....Bob. They lived a peaceful life in their little hamster town bein' all stupid and things. BUT,it wouldn't be for long cause THEY WERE GONNA HAVE A Baby!!!!!!!!! yeeeeesss, a tiny feeeeetus......

SOON the Baby was aaaaalmost due and Rachel felt it. The day came and they had to walk 15 miles in the snow, barefoot, and with no shoes, and nothing covering their feet! They were getting tired, SO they hitched a ride on a friendly block of wood! There was only one problem, THERE WAS NO STREET!!!! SO, they had to cut themselves a street using herings, and the herings SMELLED!!!!! WHOOOOO, THEY SURE DID SMELL!!!!!! WHEN they got done with the street, EVERYBODY came from miles around to see the new street, and why they made it, because there was already a street across...the...umm...street!

They then got back up on their wooden block and rode away into the sunset with the song "The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly" playing in the background. Some people stopped and looked at them with tears in their eyes and said, "MAN!!! Those people sure had a really nice block of wood!!"

And nowwwww, FOR SOME RANOM NONESCENSE!!!!!!!!!

PLAYING A BAGPIPE IS JUST LIKE SQUEEZING A CAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK!!!!!!!!!!!!

AFTER years, and YEARS of traveling they FINALLY reached the hospital. The doctors took Rachel away to the emergency room while Bob paced the floor, knawing on the drapes. THEN, a doctor called him into the room to see. Rachel sat there with a Baby. THEY WERE SO HAPPY!!!! They wanted to know if the little brat was a boy or a girl, and to their surprise, THE DOCTOR DIDNT KNOW!!!!!!!! uhhhh, yeah. SO WHEN THE BIRTH CERTIFICAT WAS HANDED TO THEM.....THEY DIDNT HAVE A NAME!!!!!!!! Sooooooooo, they named it "Standy" because they didn't know if it was a boy or a girl.

After that, THEY WENT HOME!! Days past and Standy got bigger, and bigger, and BIGGER!!!!! SOON THE Baby FILLED UP THE WHOLE ROOM!!!!!!!!!

Nobody noticed......

One day, the Standy's parental units were taking it for a walk and SOMETHING HAPPENED!!!!!!

and Standy started to get REALLY STRETCHED OUT!!!!!! Then something AMAZING happened.........STANDY SPILT INTO TWO SEPARATE HAMS!!!!!!!!! A BOY AND A GIRL!!!!!!! Stan AND Sandy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and uhhh, nobody noticed........ I have run out of ideas, sooooooooooo, THAT IS HOW Stan AND Sandy CAME TO BE!!!!!!!!!.............................. THE END!!!!!!!!!!!

"MASHIMARO!!!!! THAT IS SOOO TOTALLY UNCOOL!!!!!" Sandy yelled.

"SHUT UP YOU FEET SMELLING OF.....THING!!!!!!!!!" MashiMaro yelled back.

"NOBODY YELLS AT MY SISTER!!!" Stan joined in.

"CAN IT BEFORE I BITE BOTH YER FACES OFF YOU FEEEEETUSES!!!!!!!!!" MashiMaro shrieked.

:lol: Very insteresting Lila, and very origenal *claps*

WHOO!! THANK YOU!!!!

No problem Ms. Lila *bows*

Those stories...the one about Cappy and the one about Maxwelll....I heard those stories before on a website I saw.

Ibet you did....because we submitted them to maaaany many websites! =D

(Since were doing fan-fics in this topic I'd thought I could post this up, it's a Ham-Ham verson of Celebrity Jeopardy)

*Jeopardy theme plays*


Alex Trebek: Welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy. We've had an interesting first round. Now let's take a look at our contestants.

*Camera Moves To Maxwell*

Alex Trebek: In third place with negative seven thousand dollars is Maxwell, as he rang in and failed to answer a series of first round questions due to the fact that he was so attached into that book he's currently reading.

Maxwell: *looking in his book*

Alex Trebek: MAXWELL!

Maxwell: Heke? Oh I'm sorry.

Alex Trebek: In second place is Oxnard with negative eighty-one thousand dollars.

Oxnard: *Rings in* I'd like to use a life-line.

Alex Trebek: This is Jeopardy Mr. Oxnard.

Alex Trebek: And in the lead with twenty-five dollars is our returning champion, Hamtaro.

Hamtaro: Heya Alex.

Alex Trebek: Alright, let's get this over with, the categories are, Potent Potables, What's Outside?, Generic Anime Hamster's Named Hamtaro...

Hamtaro: Hey! That's my name!

Alex Trebek: Good for you, you can read.

Alex Trebek: Potpourri, What Sound A Doggie Makes, Ponies, and Historic Dates. Wait...that's regular Jeopardy that will be taped later today, so let's just replace that last category with, Breakfast Cereals Ending With The Word "Inamon Toast Crunch".

Alex Trebek: Now Hamtaro, your in the lead so we'll start with you.

Hamtaro: I'll pass.

Alex Trebek: Fair enough. Maxwell why don't you pick a category.

Maxwell: *still reading his book*

Alex Trebek: Very well, I'LL pick a category for you. How about, Generic Anime Hamster's Named Hamtaro for $200. And the answer is...This is the only generic anime hamster named Hamtaro.

*all the hams are clueless*

Alex Trebek:....Just someone simply say, "Who is Hamtaro?" and you've answered correctly. In fact one of you at this very moment is Hamtaro.

*the time up buzzer goes off*

Alex Trebek: And you've all failed as human beings.

Maxwell: But, were hamsters.

Alex Trebek: I don't care. Now then, Oxnard why don't you pick a category.

Oxnard: Let's try "Breakfast Cereals Ending With The Word Inamon Toast Crunch."

Alex Trebek: And the answer is, this breakfast cereal ends with "Inamon Toast Crunch".

*all the hams stare*

Alex Trebek: Your owners have probably eaten this cereal before, in fact the author of this fan-fic eats it every morning for breakfast.

*time out buzzes goes off*

Alex Trebek: The answer of course, is Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

Oxnard: *rings in*

Alex Trebek: What is it Mr. Oxnard.

Oxnard: I've lost my seed.

Hamtaro: AGAIN?!

Alex Trebek: Okay, you know what let's just move on to Final Jeopardy, the category is "How Are You Feeling, Right Now".

*Final Jeopardy music plays as the hams write down they're answers*

Alex Trebek: You could draw, a smiley face or a frowny face or a picture of yourself being hanged, it could be ANY feeling at all.

*Final Jeopardy music ends*

Alex Trebek: Okay let's get this over with. Ok Maxwell you wrote down....nothing, and your wager, nothing.

Alex Trebek: I can't believe it. You of all hams can't answer a simple question like that.

Maxwell: I....I can't read or write.

Alex Trebek: Okay, Oxnard you wrote down, sweaters.

Oxnard: I wasn't paying any attention.

Alex Trebek: Okay, and your wager......You drew a picture of a sunflower seed.

Oxnard: Can I at least solve the puzzle?

Alex Trebek: Killing you is going to be the greatest moment of my life. Okay, and Hamtaro you wrote....Hamtastic, fine. Now let's look at your wager..... -$1000, let me get this straight, you have the correct answer, but you want to LOSE money?

Hamtaro: I don't need all of it anyway.

Alex Trebek: No, your playing for charity.

Hamtaro: Oh.

Alex Trebek: That's all for Celebrity Jeopardy, once again, money has been taken away from charity. I'm Alex Trebek and I'm jumping off a bridge, good night.

(to CoreMaster's story) LOL! That's a mad good story.. I want to make a good story but I can't think of a plot like thatt ;_;

LOL! :D

THAT WAS CUTE, MR. OXNARD!!!!!!!!!!!! =D

I might do another one, this time with Stan, Dexter and Panda. :)

:blink: why didnt u explain mashimaro was telling it at the beginnign of the first 1? :blink: and also what up using the word fetus alot? :blink: :blink: :blink: :blink:

weeeeeeeee time to spam

fish,cat,chicken,dgjghosdjhklsgrjh,blah,phhhhhhh

1. I don't know
2. FETUS IS SACRED!!!!!!

Those are very odd stories indeed.

Thank you! That's what we planned!

=O They will haunt my dreams for the rest of my life.....

That's good.

okay im just gonna guess mashimaro's favorite word is fetus

nooo.....her favorite word(s) are "get out of my way" and "I'll kill you"

O.o

Sounds like Lila, not Mashimaro. :mellow:

One time I heard this scary storie and I wet my pants! =O

HO HO HO HO HO..... Do I sound like Santa! wooooooo

QUOTE

One time I heard this scary storie and I wet my pants!

Oh you did not. <_<

heheheheh, lol wooooooo

She lied to get attention. Typical of her. (I know I'm harsh on her, but she makes dumb posts)

The Maxwell story was how me and Lila met <=D

S/J/H. WHY. AER YOU REVIVING ALL OF ALEX'S OLD POSTS?.