Here's my long collection of quotes. (What else am I supposed to say? :P )




In the "behind the laughter episode:"
Homer Simpson: I was raised in front of the TV and I turned out TV.
And the simpsons live in North Kentucky! 0_0!




1/3/03

"He won't tell his sister. He won't tell his mother. He won't tell his father. But he'll tell Shaquile O'neil." -My sister, about Static Shock.



1/3/03

"Anybody wanna die?" -Father, but then, he holds out a small single dice, and I rephrase it.


"Just because I have a short attention span doesn't mean I" - My Agenda Book. 2/4/03, Page 131,



2/5/03

"Ah, I see by that interested noise that you are interested in buying my matter transporter."
"Hmm... Wellll... it only transports maaaatterrrrr...." - Dr. Frink and Homer, Respectively.


And it wasn't long, before this yearly custom became an annual tradition. - The Sea Captain.


I love you more than the butterscotch pond or the porno bush. - Homer, in Eden.


Blessed are the vegetarians, for they shall eat the earth. :) -Sister, 3/25/03



But wait, she isn't deceased! -J
But she died. -M
Oh. Ooohhhh..... -J -On Buffy The Vampire Slayer, 4/1/03
(Explaining how "The First" Was able to look like Buffy and taunt Spike.)



I support them in no way the UN recognizes! -Saddam Hussain on Suicide Bombers, making the speech for the UN. Sister's Political Cartoon, Ms. O'Hara's Class. 4/3/03


Dread, Syringe, Bellow, Blew, Greed, Violent, Igottago. -The 7 perverted colors of the rainbow. :-Þ


4/14/03
I don't think that wisdom wears goggles. -Sister, Looking for a "wisdom" dragon.


Have you come to worship the great squirrel-bear god that lives im my soup? - Guy with a bear's behind on his head, Sabotage Dragoon by C-Dawg. In the Mold Cavern.


"I trunk." -myself, accidentally shortening the sentence, "Why Mother dear, I believe we have something in the trunk."


"I upped my pledge." "Up yours." -A bulletin board.


4/25/03
"Vetzach sahn Tah'luh."
-Sister, saying "Liver is paper," in Authonian Elven.


5/6/03
"Maybe this will teach you a lesson, because Kids Never Learn!" -Chief Wiggum, in the episode of the curfew, and "The Bloodening."


5/7/03
"When I was a child, I stole a loaf of bread, and put it in the freezer until it was hard and cold, and robbed a bank with it." -Some French Lady, on board the "Honeybunch," ship of Lost Souls (Sailed by the Sea Captain.)


5/20/03 Series Finale of Buffy The Vampire Slayer:
Buffy: I just realized something.
Something I had never realized before.
...
We're going to win.


5/31/03
Try to piece together Scotland's history, if you can. Use Scotchtape if necessary. -Sister's book thingy.


6/7/03
Homer Simpson's REM Immitation:

Leon Whatshisname Herman Muenster Motorcade Birthday Party Cheetos
Pogo Sticks and Lemonade You symbiotic stupid jerk, that's right Flanders,
I, Am, Talking, About, You.


6/9/03
"Test The Nation" - show to identify the nations' IQ.
One lady, when asked about her gum and why she spit it out, she said,
"I spit it out cause I thought It was confusing."


6/12/03
This is the worst thing you've ever done! -Marge.
You say that so much it's lost all meaning. -A mildly disgruntled Homer.



8/6/03
"I used Koolah's 3rd Law to prove that he committed the crime."
"What's Koolah's 3rd law?"
"Oh, that he rotates around the sun. But HE didn't know that." -Dick Solomon, 3rd Rock From The Sun.


9/1/03
Want to see the world's fastest Card Trick? Want to see it again? -David Levitan, Magician, Performing at Cousin's Bar Mitzvah.

9/16/03
Don't start with me, Toaster. -Teilyr, Pure Zelda Classic. (Yes, that's right, I record things.)

9/23/03
Oh my God, it's 11:15! We've been spinning for hours!! -Lisa, after meeting the character voiced by Frankie Munez.

9/24/03
Sam And Potatos. Sam And Potatos. SamAndPotatos. SalmonPotatos... Ew. Imagine finding a bone in your potatoes. -Sister.


9/30/03
"How do you spell Gargantuan?" - Ralph Iantosca.
"B-I-G." - English Teacher.


10/1/03
(mIRC type action:) * BH4 Doesn't Cough. * - Myself, thinking to myself while stretching, which is an achievement.


10/1/02
A Yearbook staff editor called concerning the "lack" of a baby picture for the yearbook of me. So I tell my father that thay never said it had to be a picture of ME as a baby, so I went looking for jars of Gerber baby food. ;)


10/2/03
Hmm.. Homer's oddyssey. Is this about that Minivan I once rented? -Homer.


10/7/03
Oh no.. if Marge marries Arty, .. I'll never be born! *Sobs* -Homer.


10/8/03
That Cookie was confusing. -Little girl in my imagination.


10/8/03
"Why do those things mean more to me than school or Church?" -Bart Simpson.
"Because those things suck." - Jeff Jenkins, Danger Dog. - Anger episode.

10/8/03
"Where the hell is that soothing music coming from" - Marge, Anger Episode.


10/12/03
[MONOTONOUS VOICE] WE ARE THE BORG INTERNS. RESISTANCE =MAY= BE FUTILE. ... HOLD ON, WE'LL CHECK." - Myself, thought up on the way back home from somewhere..


10/20/03
"My one objective at parties is to not be invited to another." -Sister.


10/22/03
Boy George asks Jay Leno, "What's your sign" Jay responds, "Feces." - Jay Leno show.


11/8/03
When Dungeons and Dragons gets boring: You open the chest. Inside, You find an apple. You eat it. It tastes good. You also find pie. You eat it. It tastes good. You also find a scroll of magic arrow. You eat it. It tastes good. -Myself, .. sometime.


11/19/03
"Replace the Ink Cartride OR DIE!!!!11!11!11oneone... -Myself, After Sister mentions "toner" written on the wall in the show Angel, written in Blood. Ah, the art of sarcasm. @ @,


11/20/03
Miss Katchansky is forced to stay up to the late hours of the morning due to the creaking ship noises. She sat up in bed with a crowbar, with red circles under her eyes, chanting the sounds the ship was making. "Ratakata, Karut, Petoo. Ratakata, Karut, Petoo." .. "Ratunk, .. what the HELL is Ratunk? 0_0; " - Sister and I, eating Breakfast.


11/20/03
"WOOHOO! I've been jailed on six continents! Now all I have to do is kill a Penguin."
- Homer, as heard in the kitchen for Sunday's Fox Five Shows.


11/22/03
Viewers like you?!?! .. "A thousand viewers like you were seen storming the capital today.."
- Sister, .. 9:59 Sat Night. Yep, I thought it was the news. >.<

1/11/04
Yeah, my neck is sore from agreeing so much. - Worker, Simpsons, Homer's new Krusty's show.


1/11/04
Malcolm: What's he doing out there? (Looking at Dewey, holding dirt in his hand.)
Reese: I put a rock in his hand. He's trying to make it grow. <(0 0,)>

1/14/04
Clark: But I sent her a card!
Chloe: There's nothing like a dollar fifty piece of cardboard to say you love someone.


"You have not converted someone because you have silenced them." - John Morley, writer / statesman.

1/23/04
"I've forgotten how to miss. I guess I'll just have to take care of the ones that go first." - Dekar, Lufia II, before tackling the Doom Island Fortress.

2/6/04
"You have to be scared to be brave." - Mr. Gerardi, Joan of Arcadia.

2/6/04
"Grace - A little bit of truth. You have to be open to accept that truth." - God. (DIFFERENT!)

3/3/04
"I've been unreasonable, because I've lost all reason." - Wesley, after losing Fred to a goddess.

3/22/04
"I expect to see more than 100% attendance on Friday. .. bring .. friends or something. -My crazy Government / Economics teacher, Mr. Kalner.


3/22/04
Often times, that feeling of "love" in your guy is synonymous with gas. Sometimes you think you're in love, but it's merely gas. Sometimes, you think you have gas, but you really love someone. ... So perhaps it can be said, .. that "I truly LOVED that burrito." - Myself.


4/10/04
Misread the line "Carry the food to the packmule" as "Carry the food 'and' the packmule" - Sister. J - Then what's the point of even HAVING a packmule if you have to CARRY it! o_O


4/10/04 (-RIGHT- after the previous.)
"*cough*anklechopper*cough* - Sister - when passing a Dwarf.


4/17/04 (while watching a Bruce Lee movie.)
ME-You cannot change people with your fists. Only with your words.
YU-You can change people's noses with your fists.
ME-I obviously cannot teach you with my words.


5/6/04
Phoebe: "Someday I'll tell you about the time I stabbed a cop."
Monica: "Phoebe!"
Phoebe: "WELL HE STABBED ME FIRST!"


5/6/04 - Rachel had made a "Tripe" or something like that. Everyone hid their ill feelings concerning its ingredients, which included foods from all 4 taste centers.
"What's not to like? Custard? Good. Jam? Good. Meat? GOOOD!" - Joey, Friends.


5/6/04
"He called his character 'dickhead'; all the other characters suddenly become abusive. For example, Dupre says 'We must press on, dickhead!'" - The Ultima 7 Serpent Isle Funny Files.


5/20/04
Homer Simpson: "Marge, owning this gun was the greatest thing that's ever happened to me!
When I hold it, I felt this incredible surge of power,
like GOD must feel when HE'S holding a gun."

5/24/04
So, suppose you were a policeman chasing down a killer who tosses something dangerous at a kid. Would you save that one child, or would you try to arrest the killer, who may kill MORE kids?

-,* I might save the kid and call for backup. We know where he is now, he can't get far... anyway, the other kids he MIGHT kill are proverbial chickens who haven't hatched. - Sister


5/25/04 (Thinking to myself, While doing Economics Homework: )
"Consumers buy more when the price is low than they do while high."


5/28/04
"We played Monkey In The Middle." "Primate In The Center?" "The Centrifugal Force Of Monkeys."
Myself, Father, Sister, respectively.


5/28/04 - MadTV's John Madden's movies - LOTR.
"What is should have been called: "What the hell am I looking at?" "Too many Wizards. Not enough smurfs."


5/28/04
"Look for me next week, on an even smaller timeslot, on an even smaller show, with an even smaller left eye." - Shannon Doherty, on MadTV's sketch about Scare Tactics Zone.. whatever.


6/9/04
"Yo mama so fat, we're in her right now." - Mama jokes, had to remember.
Yo mama so fat, every time someone say "Kool Aid" she bursts through the wall.
Yo momma is so fat she put on a pair of Guess Jeans and the answer popped out.
Yo momma's so fat she can't even fit in the chat room.


Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" its "Hi, how are you?" -------Rest stop off Route 81, WV


7/30/04 - Sister, asked to change music to something exiting. Turns off music. "It is the exciting sounds, of silence."

Oh...those are cool!

HA! ^_^ I like that one it's cute!