Title: Ask Xantos
Description: *ahem* Your attention please.
Xantos - February 7, 2006 12:31 AM (GMT)
Alright kiddies, listen up. Xan-sensei is here, and we're gonna commit some major overhaul on our spelling and grammar. Stop groaning, I'll only make it harder.
Their, They're, and There and other commonly mistaken words.
Right. First. These are EVERYWHERE and they make my EYEBALLS BLEED MUSTARD. And I hate mustard. Let's take their/there/their first.
Their: Possessive. Their dog, their house, their problem.
They're: They are. Used in situations like "They're at the store."
There: Place. "It's over there." "Go there."
Your/You're
You're: You are. Again, "You're stupid" "You're green."
Your: Posessive. "Is that your dog?"
Its/It's
This one is rather challenging. Basically It's is "It is", and Its is everything else. Although It's can also be possessive, and then it can be hard to decide which goes there. I hate to admit it, but I still make this mistake.
Its: "It extended its arm"
It's: "What? Yeah, it's mine."
To/Too/Two
Again, another popular one, and one of my special not-favorites. I really hate this one, but I hate all of these.
To: Used in situations like "I am going to the store" "I need to brb"
Too: See "Also"
Two: 2. Nothing more, nothing less. Just a number.
Xantos/Hey you/That burny guy
I don't see why this one is so hard. It's just six letters. (No just kidding. I'm just trying to spice things up so you won't fall asleep.)
Drier/Dryer
Honestly I've never seen this one. But it was suggested to me, so I'll stick it up here.
Drier: Not as wet as [item].
Dryer: An appliance commonly found in homes.
Hour/Our
Hour: A unit of time.
Our: Possessive. "Our dog." "Our faucet." "Our problem."
Who/Hoo
This one isn't as much of a problem I've noticed, but it's going up anyway, due to suggestion.
Who: A person in question.
Hoo: The noise an owl makes.
Alright, well. That's probably enough for now. "Lesson 2: Amazing Apostrophies" will be posted 'later'. AKA whenever the heck I feel like it.
PS: Avoid MS Word Grammar check like the plague. It will screw you over sooooo badly it's not funny. And oh, by the way. Feel free to post questions about spelling and grammar in here, and I'll do my best to assist you in fixing things.
Xantos - February 7, 2006 05:27 PM (GMT)
Rar. Well, I've got nothing better to do, sooooooooooo. Drumroll please.
Badabadabadabadabadabadapatsssh
Amazing Apostrophes. Is an s coming or not?
HUGE pet peeve. First of all: Apostrophes do not mean "Hey look, here comes an 's'! I have seen SO MANY PEOPLE unable to use these simple little units of speech correctly. An apostrophe simply means that there has been a letter (or letters) omitted from a word (or words). Examples include it's, they're, how're, we're, ne'er, makin' and so forth. In it's, the space and i from is have been omitted. In they're it's the space and a from are. Same with how're, we're, et cetera. It's really not that hard.
Other common uses of the apostrophe are things such as dialect. For example, let's say you've got a pirate.
"Avast ye landlubbin' swabs! I do be makin' ye walk yon plank!"
In this case, our pirate friend has omitted two 'g's. Once from "landlubbin'" or land loving, and once from "makin'" or making. "Ye" is a bit harder to tell. Honestly I've never known whether it's got one or not. Do your own thing here. Maybe even Google it if you're feeling adventurous.
Some commonly apostrophe'd words are:
's - is
're - are
'll - will
-in' - -ing
Also, there's another, slightly more obscure use of the apostrophe. Any time you're trying to show posessive, you would use an apostrophe.
"Oh, that's Tim's cadilac."
"Find Joe's house."
HOWEVER. If the person's name ends in an 's,' it's a special case. Watch.
"That's Thomas' toy."
"Find James' paper for him."
"That's Xantos' wand."
You NEVER say Thomas's/James's/et cetera. If the name ends in an 's', you simply attach an apostrophe to the end and move on. It's a strange rule. English is weird. It's the hardest language -in the world-. Just keep working at it, you'll learn eventually. Edit: Well. You learn something new every day. I've just been informed that TECHNICALLY it's correct either way. I guess it was just the way I was taught then. So in the end it comes down to prefrence and flow, I guess.
Alright kiddies. That's all for today's lesson. Homework!
Fix the apostrophes in these sentences:
1. Well I neer!
2. Ah thanks its tahm fer sum huntin an fishin!
3. Were going to the store. Want to come with?
4. Theres Drew Cary!
5. Youre going to clean up this mess, young man, or youll get no dessert for a week!
Lesson 3 "Those Crazy Commas. Should I use one?" will be next.
Xantos - February 9, 2006 06:01 PM (GMT)
Those Crazy Commas: When should I use one?
Simmer down folks, simmer down. Class is in session. Answers to last time's homework are below:
1. Well I ne'er!
2. Ah thanks it's tahm fer sum huntin' an' fishin'!
3. We're going to the store. Want to come with?
4. There's Drew Cary!
5. You're going to clean up this mess, young man, or you'll get no dessert for a week!
Alright. Today's lesson is on a piece of language you see everwhere you go. Mr. Comma. Guest stars for today will be his buddies Mr. Period and Ms. Semi-colon.
Now. I'm going to be honest with you, I still have trouble with these. Mostly because I follow the "Whenever you take a breath" rule. It tends to hurt me more than it helps me. If you follow it also, I'd reccomend you attempt to phase out of that if at all possible.
Now, our first lesson in using the comma will be fairly simple. Whenever your character changes from action to speech or vice-versa in the same sentence, you place a comma. Watch.
"Oh that's cool," Xantos muttered.
Notice how despite the fact that the sentence that Xantos said was complete, instead of using a period I used a comma. That's because if a period had been used it would have changed 'Xantos muttered' to it's own sentence, thus resulting in a fragment. Obviously this would have been bad.
Voice can also come after an action, as seen below.
"Cool..." Xantos ran his hand over the surface of the wand, admiring the craftsmanship, muttering, "This is beautiful..."
Honestly I think that it feels weird to put text after action, but if you like to do it, feel free to use that method. Just make sure you do it correctly.
Commas are basically just a pause in a thought. Some people say anywhere you take a breath. This is the meathod I use, but I tend to use them more than I need. Really it's a matter of flow, you put one where it would improve flow most.
Something I must reiterate, however. Commas are not periods, or confetti! I admit, I'm guilty of this myself. It takes work to fix. You'll get it eventually.
Here is an example of the comma being used incorrectly:
Xantos paused, firing off a spell, he rapidly dodged to the side before the monster's attack connected.
Notice how it's hard to read that. That's because this is an example of a run-on sentence, or an effect I like to call "The Smush Effect." A sentence is simply a piece of a larger thought, known as a paragraph. A run-on occurs when a sentence is improperly defined by it's surrounding punctuation marks (the periods and commas). The previous example is, in fact, several sentences "Smushed" together. Watch.
Xantos paused. Firing off a spell, he rapidly dodged to the side before the monster's attack connected.
Much easier to read, isn't it? See how much difference a simple period makes? It's the same way with the comma. Remember how much harder it was without the period? Trust me. It's a huge difference when you have six or seven run-ons per paragraph. Proper punctuation is critical.
The lack of a comma can be just as powerful as the comma itself. Watch.
Xantos paused firing off a spell he rapidly dodged to the side before the monster's attack connected.
This would again be considered a run-on. Also, notice how it again became harder to keep your train of thought while reading that. The reason being, without the commas there, there's nothing to slow you down. The comma is a powerful tool. It can make you or break you, depending on how it's used.
That's all for this lesson. No homework this time. Now get outta here y'crazy kids. Go have fun.
Xantos - February 27, 2006 03:43 PM (GMT)
I tell ya what, let's take a break from our spelling and grammar for a while. Today we'll work on our story writing.
Once upon a time...
Okay. Something I've seen heavy abuse of in the Regs, is people just putting something like "i went 2 gamefaqs and lookd @ a faq 4 infecton and found dis." I'm sorry my friend, that is not a story. That is just syntax genocide. A story is a work of art. A story has several basic parts. Let's list them off, shall we?
In general, a story will contain...
-|-----------------------
| = Heroes (AKA Protagonists)
| = Villans (Antagonists, whatever.)
| = Some basic plot
| = Decent length (Depends on the type of story)
| = Some obstacles the heroes must overcome, be they manmade or villan-made
| = Plenty of detail (Detail is your friend. Abuse it.)
-|-----------------------
There are others, but these are pretty much the essential parts that every story must contain. A lot of stories contain subplots, which as most of us probably know, are just a branch-off of the main plot.
To create a good story, one thing is of overall importantce. The author must enjoy his or her work. I write things because I enjoy writing about them. Another thing that I find helps is writing with your emotions. I can't seem to write unless I'm in a certain mood. Something that seems to help create that mood is music. Find a song you like and just set it for repeat. Or a CD, or playlist. Whatever boats your float. Being comfortable is quite helpful.
Useful aids in writing are:
= A Dictionary. I don't suggest spellcheck first because it tends to miss things. But you can add to spellcheck which is nice.
= A good grasp of grammar. Whatever you do, do NOT use MS Word Grammar check. I find that it's frequently wrong. It's actually easier to check things by hand, believe you me.
= A friend willing to go over your work and make constructive criticisim.
I think that's all I've got time to post right now. Tell ya what. Next time we'll continue with...
Plot Holes from Outer Spaaaaaace....ace...ace....
