Chris Walker-Bush is backstage, and announces that tonight we will see Chopstick, Baron Erich von Crazcke, Ralph 'The Ice' Burgesson, and Shadta compete in a four corners match. The winner will take on MrCharisma next week for his Hardcore title!

Match One- Chopstick vs. Shadta vs. Baron Eric Von Craczske vs. Ralph 'The Ice' Burgesson for #1 Hardcore Contendership
Shadta gets caught with a short powerbomb from Baron. Back suplex on Shadta. 1 - 2 - kick out. Tag between Baron Erich von Crazcke and Ralph 'The Ice' Burgesson. Rude Awakening on Shadta by Ice. Front legsweep slam by Ralph 'The Ice' Burgesson, that was cool. 1 - 2 - kick out before the 3. Tag to Chopstick. Chopstick hits a dropkick on Shadta. Tag between Shadta and Baron Erich von Crazcke. Baron drives a forearm into the chest of Chopstick. Chopstick gets out the back of a Baron Erich von Crazcke bodyslam attempt. Really cool stunner-type thing out of the corner from Chopstick, Baron might be dead. 1 - 2 - 3. Chopstick defeats Baron. Shadta with a spinning neckbreaker on Chopstick. Big piledriver on Chopstick. 1 - 2 - shoulder up. Rude Awakening on Chopstick by Shadta. Tag to Ralph 'The Ice' Burgesson. Ice drives a thrust kick into the chest of Shadta. Thrown slam by Ralph 'The Ice' Burgesson. Shadta fights out of a grapple. Flying shoulder tackle by Shadta sends Ice to the mat. Powerbomb on Ice. 1 - 2 - 3. Shadta pinned Ice. Massive backbreaker, Chopstick got planted. Powerbomb on Chopstick. 1 - 2 - kick out before the 3. Chopstick fights out of a grapple. Chopstick grapples with Shadta, and positions himself so that the referee can't see...and hits a low blow! He rolls up the stunned Shadta: 1....2....3!! What a cheap shot!
WINNER: Chopstick by pinfall

Match Two- Reg Reagan vs. Party Boy

Kick from Party Boy...to the leg! Oh the humanity! Reagan counters an avalanche with a raised foot to the face. Reg Reagan hits some punches. Reagan whips Party Boy into the turnbuckles...and the referee gets sandwiched. Party Boy walks into a slammy shoulder thing. Cover, but there's no one to count for Reg Reagan. Party Boy counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Kick by Party Boy...to the facial regions. Break that nose! Yeah! Spinning bulldog in the corner, Reagan is down. 1 - 2 - kick out. Springboard dropkick from Party Boy...that looked pretty cool. 1 - 2 - 2.999 Party Boy walks into a trip. Spear by Reg Reagan. 1 - 2 - kick out before the 3. Party Boy blocks a punch. Steel comes running down the aisle with a chair! Party Boy whips Reg Reagan into the ropes. Steel jumps onto the apron with the chair! Collision between Steel, Reagan, and the chair! Reg Reagan staggers back into a roll up! 1...2...3! It's over! Party Boy and Steel put the boots to Reg Reagan, stomping away on him.
WINNER: Party Boy by pinfall

Match Three- Senor Ding Dong © vs. Tonto
Standing kicky thing by Senor Ding-Dong on Tonto. Ding Dong hits a face jam on Tonto onto a chair. Flying elbow from Senor Ding-Dong. Ding Dong uses a basement dropkick to the knee. Tonto backdrops Senor Ding-Dong out of a piledriver attempt. Tonto sets up a chair, then bounces off it to hit a flying avalanche into the corner I missed what happened for a few minutes as i went to get a beer...i'm going to take an educated guess and say that Bruiser Brody made a stunning return and beat everyone up, then left. I'm sticking with that story until proven wrong. 1 - 2 - kick out. Senor Ding-Dong ducks a Tonto clothesline. Spinning bulldog in the corner, Tonto is down. 1 - 2 - kick out. Cool looking suplex on Tonto. 1 - 2 - almost a 3. Tonto reverses a Senor Ding-Dong hammerlock. Tonto hits a massive spinning kick to the jaw. Ding Dong blocks a kick from Tonto. Kick by Senor Ding-Dong...to the facial regions. Break that nose! Yeah! Rose Byrne has climbed up onto the apron! Ding Dong turns...and falls for the distraction! Tonto runs at Ding Dong from behind...but misses! Tonto collides with Rose Byrne! Senor Ding-Dong moves in for the kill. Here it comes - Bellringer! 1....2...3, it's finished. Tonto \ Byrne are beating down on Senor Ding-Dong! The music of The Phantom hits, and he comes running down the aisle into the ring. Tonto and Rose Byrne bail out of the ring, leaving Senor Ding-Dong down in the ring. The Phantom may have saved Senor Ding-Dong from a brutal beating.
WINNER: Senor Ding Dong by pinfall

Main Event- Sir Quincy Penfold III © vs. Brandell for the World Title
Chop hits Penfold...that was stiffer than a 14 year old at a stripper convention. Back elbow connects, Penfold staggers backward. 1 - 2 - kick out. Penfold counters an avalanche with a raised foot to the face. Penfold hits a dropkick on The Randy Man. Dropkick connects...Randy goes down like a skanky hooker. Flying elbow from Sir Quincy Penfold III. Randy pushes out of a Sir Quincy Penfold III hold. Massive backbreaker, Penfold got planted. Sir Quincy Penfold III can barely stand. Brandell Driver!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!! Penfold is pounding the canvas with punches, shouting about how unfair everything is.
WINNER: Brandell by pinfall

(Chopstick talks on the phone to an unknown person)

Chopstick: Ahh my friend i know what a struggle it can be when these type of incidents occur.

(pause)

Chopstick: Yes well i know just this week ive been training this young wrestler on how not to lick his balls in public, absolute killer but how can you show him in public when he behaves like he hasnt seen the far side of six.

(pause)

Chopstick: Well ill see what i can do. Ill tie his shoelaces and send him out to dismantle some poor wifes young husband.

(Wolf enters the room batting at flies, one lands on the door frame long enough for Wolf to take a whack, the door frame splinters and Wolf looks up innocently)

Wolf: Chopstick sir another ones gone and broken.

Chopstick: Of course of course Wolf thats only two walls today arent you being careful. (still on the phone chopstick makes a quick decision.) Well sorry must go i have to call the carpenter again.

(Footage cuts)

As the footage of Chopstick and his dog like companion finish the ring explodes with light and our hero El se·ñor Ding Dong with a microphone and two masked companions apear in the middle of the ring.

El se·ñor Ding Dong: Fans and friends, ladies and gentle men, after that horible grudge match and the terrible ordeal or Isabels death it is hard to know who to trust so i have employed two new super hero's to join me in my new stable THE INCREDIBLE JUSTICE LEAGUE.

The crowd goes wild and the two figures one in a purple and black out fit very similar to the masked man at the funeral and the grudge match, oh it is the same person and a man in blue tights with orange undies pulled over the top, orange cape and a orange bandana covering the top half of the face with eye holes cut very poorly jump around histerically

El se·ñor Ding Dong: Well i'll let them introduce themselves.

Ding dong passes the microphone to the first companion.

The Drunken Phantom: As many of you loyal ASWF fans guessed i am of Walker Heritage but since i am the iligitamate son of the Ghost who walks i go under the name of the Ghost who drinks or more comonly known The Drunken Phantom. Well thats enough about me now over to you Heath, um i mean Captain InsaneO.

The Drunken Phantom passes the mic

Captain InsaneO: Whooo , yeah im hear to kick some hairy smelly no good punk arse so this is my official warning to punks like Jessie cornish, Party boy, Steel, Tonto and Pawn get your act together your all disgraces to this federation your nothing but hard core want to be little bitches, so wake up or ill have to open a can of woop ass on all of your worthless hides.

Ding dong slaps Captain Insaneo in the back of the head and the three disapear into the darkness

(Chopstick and Wolf are in the practise ringwhere Chopstick tries to explain the complexities of the figure four leg lock to a confused looking Wolf. They each have a dummy, Chopstick demonstrates on his dummy that the leglock when used correctly can break the dummies leg He strains with the lock for ten or so seconds before the thick plastic leg snaps in two. Wolf tries to do the hold but is embarrassingly bad at it and seems to have no idea. Chopstick stands up shaking his head and walks to the camera while wolf practices in the background)

Chopstick: Welcome all to the new Gym. Here i do my best to teach some of the more talented junior wrestlers around the glorious ways of our sport. Im also trying to teach Wolf. Anyway enough about that. What im here for tonight is to recap the week. The first surprise for the week comes courtesy of Costumes R Us. A man describing himself as the Drunken Phantom has rented a costume and joined our federation. It appears to be the lynchpin in the making of a new stable. The Inedible Horsemush League or something along those lines. These guys have also been joined by captain Lamo. Poor captain Lamo seems to have been unable to buy a costume and had to cut down poor old mums orange curtains. Tonto must feel releived to be a free agent and out of reach of spandex tights and homemeade capes. Next we face the repeated footage of Reg Reagan and Partyboy. Heres a little section of it. Ill let you guess who is who. "Im gonna shove your head up your ass then shag some ho's". "No im gonna shove your head up your ass then drink some beers". "No im gonna shove your head up your ass then shag some ho's". I could go on all day with the highly articulate and original conversations these two have but im afraid i only have so much time. Next we have my recent opponents Baron Erich von Crazcke, Ralph 'The Ice' Burgesson, and Shadta. None of these guys were able to stand up to yours truly. Finally onto the biggest news of the week. The changing of the world title belt. Poor Quincy wasnt able to escape the wrath of Brandell. Weve seen much happen in the past week but what i have planned for next week will be even more extreme. Me and Wolf shall begin to (Wolf interupts Chopstick by patting him on the head with the dummy he is still carrying.) What is it Wolf?

Wolf: Well the four figure legsock doesnt seem to work Mr Chopstick. It would be easier to break the dummies leg with another legsock or something.

Chopstick: Ok then Wolf if you can use another lock to break the dummies leg then you never have to do the leglock again, Show me what youve got that can break his leg.

(Wolf smilesas he weilds the dummy. He grabs the leg up near the thigh with both hands, quickly flexes his arms and snaps the leg in three seconds.)

Chopstick: That'll do wolf that'll do. Stay tuned people. If i teach this guy to wrestle ever it could get ugly.

(Footage cuts with chopstick examining the broken leg of the dummy.)

footage cuts away from stupid chopstick and his pointless adventures to a REAL hero. Sir Quincy Penfold the Third of unheralded breeding is at a board meeting at his famed handlebar moustache emporium.

Lefty McDaniles: O great and benevolant leader, the stock holders are concerned about your focus after being cheated out of your world title-

Lord Petherington:Oh i say!

Garfield Sobers Jr: I concur!

Lefty: I have a right to talk, i have the speaking hat on!! I demand to know how you plan to reclaim your title? (lefty hands the speaking cap to SQP3, everybody is careful not to look him in the eyes, for it is rumoured that such an action has dire consequences)

SQP3:Worry not, my minions, for i have a flawless plan to win back my title from whathisname, a large and generous plan that will surely see Penfolds Moustache Emporium sky rocket into even further greatness!!

Lord petherington: Oh i SAY!

SQP3:Thank you Petherington. Now let me explain further....(sQP3 pulls out a projector screen) Observe... (slide one shows a puzzled and confused looking certain ASWF CEO in a fluffy bunny suit doing something very very very naughty)

The board starts to clap.....

SQP3:As you can all plainly see, i think my world title rematch is all but guaranteed.......

In the security headquaters of the stadium three obese security gaurds are tied up gaged and blind folded in the corner while a figure is sitting in the main chair with his back turned drinking the security gaurds coffee and facing the many screens showing footage from the security camera's. On one screen there is footage of Chopstick in a rest room trying to potty train his side kick Wolf who has some how missed the toilet bowl and now has one foot standing in the mess and the other in the toilet bowl, on the next screen is Brandel and reg in thier dressing room throwing beer bottles at poster of Mr Charisma in a tye dyed thong.In the screen in the center is Steel and Party boy placing seditives in the cheer leaders water cooler, The camera next to it shows a man in a purple suit sitting in front of a table covered in goon casks, empty home brew bottles and two bundy rum bottles slaming down rum shots while a figure in a orange cape is passed out on the change room floor, the other screens are showing every day stuff that happens in the stadium but some how Rose Byrne appears in each screen one after the other as if she's looking for some one. The figure moves in front of the screens showing a tubby arm reaching over to a plate of doughnuts and the figure that has a large hat pointing over the chair laughs an evil laugh and the person in the chair starts to talk

'You might be hiding amigo but i will find you and your friends and you will regret the day you messed with this little fat bastard'