Neighborhood in shock as Brian Randell is accused of displaying flagrant homosexuality
SYDNEY- "In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only trying to retrieve the gerbil," Brian Randell told bemused doctors in the Severe Burns Unit of New York Hospital. Brian Randell, and homosexual partner "Kiki", had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong. "I pushed a cardboard tube up the rectum and slipped Ragnar , our gerbil, in," explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out "Armageddon", my cue that Kiki had enough. I tried to retrieve Ragnar but he wouldn't come out again, so I peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him."
At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman described what happened next. "The match ignited a pocket of intestinal gas and a flame shot out the tube, igniting mr Randell's hair and severely burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine, propelling the rodent out like a cannonball."
Brian Randell suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of the gerbil, while Kiki suffered first and second degree burns to the anus and lower intestinal tract.
Man I heard that radio thingy when I was your age. So I understand why you posted it. It must be hard for low minded individuals like yourself to come up with a decent joke. Looks like you have still managed to fail that.
